The Covington Family

Pregnancy: Not the Most Natural Thing in My Opinion

2012-01-25T13:54:00.000-08:00

I am now almost 31 weeks along with this whole gestating two at once experiment. My youngest child is 10 years old so it has been awhile since I have done the whole pregnancy thing. With my other two, I had easy pregnancies. No complications, no drama, felt alright and so on but I hated it none the less. Those women who say they feel fabulous while pregnant or that they love being pregnant, well, I am convinced that if you look up insanity or perhaps masochism in the DSM (that would be Diagnostic and Statistical Manuel of Mental Disorders), you would see their photo in the definition. Michelle Duggar, totally in there.

Doing this again, and with two babies at once, everything I hated about pregnancy has been amplified and after this, I am going to be taking steps to make sure this will never happen again. Never. Ever. Did I mention not again?

Here's my short list of what I won't miss about being pregnant. (Oh, and let me just say, I totally get that being able to be pregnant is a gift and that some people struggle to be pregnant and would kill to complain about morning sickness. I get that......still hate it though).

1) The Clothes: Nothing makes a woman feel more beautiful than wearing pants with elastic panels or shirts that can double as a one man tent. Manufacturers try to make the clothes hip or cute but I am not buying it. One pair of maternity pants I bought several months ago was labelled "sexy bootcut". Yeah, because there is nothing sexier than a woman who looks like she ate a basketball while sporting some elastic waist pants. Super hot.

2) The Aliens Effect: Remember that scene in the Alien movie where the alien rips itself out of the guys belly? At times, I feel like I can relate to that guy. Having something living and moving inside your body is just weird. Amazing as all get out, but weird. With two in there, it is doubly weird. Now that they are each about 3 and a half pounds, when they both get moving it just feels bizarre. The other night at around 3 a.m. it seemed they had collectively decided that it was time to try and remodel my increasingly cramped uterus. Maybe knock out a wall and add a nice extension. Oh, and someone (Baby A, I am pretty sure it was you) seemed intent on trying to kick my bladder into pulp.

3) The Seemingly Simple Things That are Now Hard: There could be quite a few things in this category, especially with this twin thing. Things like tying my shoes, picking something up off the floor, climbing the stairs, rolling over in bed (now a process rather than a fluid movement), shaving my legs, walking farther than a mile, maneuvering through tight spaces, breathing (yes, breathing) and so on.

These are probably my 3 biggest complaints and really, I will be happy to soon have my body back to myself. Fortunately, I have at the most 7 and a half more weeks of this and with twins on average coming at 35 weeks, I could be done much sooner. Despite all the grumbling, I am excited to meet these two monkeys and to have two more kids running around my house, making me laugh and causing mayhem. I am looking forward to things like this:

Sanity Is So 2011!

2012-01-03T11:55:00.000-08:00

from here

About a week ago, I was sitting on the couch eating my breakfast and trying to watch the news. My two boys were doing some sort of game that involved sliding down the stairs head first, cackling hysterically at the bottom because your pajama pants are half off, running a loop around the downstairs, and then repeat. Again, and again, and again. There was A LOT of energy and A LOT of noise.

Not to be left out of the bedlam, my hunting crazed Vizsla, Ella, had spied an interloper out in the yard. Some mangy squirrel had the audacity to climb up and perch himself in one of our trees and Ella was not going to stand for something like that. Not in her yard. In order to alert me to the small, fluffy tailed threat outside, she was batting the kitchen door with her foot and running back and forth from the door to me, whining the entire time.

Tucker, who appears to not have a real hunting bone in his body, didn't care one bit about the squirrel but being that he is 11 months old, he was not going to remain calm in the midst of his 4 legged buddy's frenetic energy so he was racing back and forth with Ella and trying to bite her on the neck at the same time.

Sitting there on the couch trying to read the newscasters lips, because I had given up actually hearing anything at this point, it occurred to me that in a few months, you can take this morning melee and add two screaming infants and a healthy dose of sleep deprivation into the mix. What a riot THAT is going to be.

Which had me wondering if registering for a straitjacket and a bucket of Valium might be more important than things like burp clothes and bottles. Goodbye sanity, I will miss you.

57 Hours and 23 Minutes To Go (if you trust a 4th grader's math that is)

2011-12-22T14:12:00.000-08:00

The house is decorated, treats have been made, the kids are off school, all the presents have been bought and wrapped, and we just got 10 inches of snow overnight. It really feels like Christmas is imminent and in case I lose that feeling in any way, I have two people in my house who are more than happy to remind me, again, and again, where we are in the countdown to the present opening. Ethan even calculated up the number of hours remaining this afternoon. I didn't check his math but I think we'll just go with his number. Here are a few things we have been up to in preparation for Christmas.

A few weeks ago, Drew's special needs class went on a field trip to a local mall. Our school is the only school in our district which has a deaf and hard of hearing program in addition to the special needs classes and the typical students. This mall, every year, brings in a special Santa who is trained in working with people with special needs and who also is fluent in American sign language. It is pretty cool because kids who otherwise would not be able to communicate with Santa can tell him what they want and kids who would have a difficult time with the over stimulation that Santa at the mall can bring get an opportunity to visit with Santa as well.

This year, Ethan, who is in 4th grade, finally admitted that he is aware we are Santa Claus. Kevin and I decided to go ahead and tell Drew about Santa, since he is in 6th grade and we are sure all of his regular education classmates are aware that there isn't a fat man living with a bunch of elves in the North Pole. We had told him maybe a few days before his field trip to the mall. A few days after the field trip, he was telling me about a toy he was going to ask Santa for. I reminded him the Kevin and I are Santa. He said, "No! I saw him at the mall. He is real!" It cracked me up because it is so like him to be so literal. If he saw him with his own eyes, it has to be real.

Ethan got these reindeer antlers when his Scout troop went to sing Christmas carols at a local retirement community. Of course, we had to put them on the dogs. Tucker was uncooperative, as any self respecting 11 month old puppy would be so he didn't get to be in the picture. We even had to sequester him in order to get Ella's picture because he seemed to be under the impression it was his JOB to remove those hideous antlers from Ella's head. Ella had to be bribed with some treats to pose and if you look closely at her expression you can see she is kind of hating me for making her do this.

Monday, me and the guys made a gingerbread house. They used every bit of candy and frosting that came with the kit and fully intend on eating that candy off the house as soon as Christmas Day comes. They are very proud of how their house turned out and I think it looks pretty darn good.

I hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas and get to enjoy spending some time with your family and friends. Merry Christmas everyone!

Catching Up

2011-12-08T13:44:00.000-08:00

Okay, so blogging has obviously taken a backseat in my life lately. I have been busy trying to get Christmas done, trying to get baby stuff bought before I am put on bed rest or just too large to move, and taking the 5 million rest breaks I seem to require these days.

So, here is an update of the goings on in our house and lives over the past month.

Let's start with a Puppers update:

Tucker is 10 months old now and keeps all of us laughing pretty much daily. Looking at him sitting on the stairs, like a human on a chair, always makes me smile. He has a blanket he drags around the house and when he is happy, which is pretty much always, he gets his blanket and wiggles his entire body.

My sister was here over Thanksgiving with her 5 month old daughter and he was, surprisingly, afraid of the baby. Naturally. Those small, 15 pound humans ARE terribly frightening. He would come near her sniffing, and then jump back. This went on for like 3 hours and if she moved near him, he would bark at her.

At one point, we were trying to get a picture of 3 generations of Harmer women and Tucker, never one to be left out, crammed himself into the picture but as far away from that awful baby as he could get just in case she attacked.

After the entire day went by, he finally started warming up to her and was able to get close, sniff her a bunch and even gave her some kisses. Little does he know come March he is going to have one of those immersion, get over your fear, type experiences when there are two of those pint sized monsters in the house.

Speaking of Thanksgiving, this was the first time Drew and Ethan were meeting their new cousin, Naomi. They were so gaga over her and took every opportunity they had to hold her and play with her. They both also got a lesson on diaper changing from my sister and paid attention like it was the most riveting thing in the world. They are going to be excellent big brothers although I have a feeling their current zeal about helping with babies and diaper changing is going to diminish some once their new siblings are actually here.

In other news, a few weeks ago, I had my 20 week ultrasound to check the babies development and to find out gender. I was really hoping for at least one girl in there. Someone who will actually, willingly and without out an ironclad itinerary, go to the mall with me, or who agrees with me that Dirty Jobs is not the greatest show ever. But alas, no. Both babies are definitely male. I guess peed on toilet seats and fart humor are my destiny. Both babies are healthy as can be and because of their gender's being the same and the way they present in utero, we won't be sure until they are born whether they are identical twins or fraternal. I am kind of hoping for fraternal as I have worries about somehow mixing up the babies in some fundamental way if they look the same. However, my friend with identical twins assures me that it only takes a week or two to be able to tell them apart.

On a side note, if you encounter a friend or heck, a complete stranger who is pregnant with twins, please, please refrain from asking if they did fertility treatments or pointing out that they are going to be huge. If I had a nickel for every time I have heard either thing since being pregnant, I would be rich. Why people feel the need to know how you conceived is beyond me and one of these days some poor soul is going to get a very sarcastic, "well, you know, when a man and a woman love each other.....", type speech from me. Also, I am fully aware, thank you very much, that I am going to be larger than someone pregnant with one baby. You do not need to remind me.

So, I think that is a sufficient update for now and since my Christmas shopping is done hopefully, I won't be such an absentee blogger.

Goodbye Muscle Tone, See You in March

2011-10-17T15:18:00.000-07:00

First off, I stink at blogging lately and I really wish I could say that it was because I was out doing lots of fabulous things. In reality, I am spending lots of time napping on the couch or looking in the fridge at the 900 beverages I have in there trying to decide which one I find least repulsive so I can hydrate myself. The rest of the time I am catching up on the things that get left behind while I am napping or fridge searching. Kind of pathetic but this is how pregnancy with two babies is going for me thus far.

My brother in law ran the Chicago Marathon a few weeks ago and also running the race that day was a women who was 38 weeks pregnant and who delivered a healthy baby a few hours post race. Wow, right?! All I can say is that if I make it to 38 weeks (on average twins come at 35 weeks) the only way you will see me running is if someone in a hockey mask with a chainsaw is chasing me and even then it will be questionable if you can call what I will be doing running. A fast waddle perhaps.

Last January, I spent a few months working with a personal trainer and then since then have been doing my usual walk 2 or 3 miles per day and in addition, I spend 2 or 3 hours a week doing the trainer stuff. As a result, I would say my muscle tone is probably the best it has ever been in my life and I have really enjoyed the weight training stuff. So, when I found out I was pregnant, my plan was to continue this routine as long as possible. My doctor said it was alright as long as it felt good and as long as I didn't lay flat on my back. He even said core work was okay. He did say that around 20 weeks I would probably need to quit.

So, I have been lunging and doing bicep curls and all that jazz but a few weeks ago, I decided it was time to call it quits. First off, the core work, ugh. Planking with a pregnant belly and contracting your abs just does not feel good. Then, there is the nausea. Instead of doing my usual back to back sets, I do one set, and then lay on the floor for like 5 minutes trying not to vomit. It makes my usual hour workout take about twice as long. Also, lately, I have sprouted a decent belly and when I lunge, the belly gets in the way. Plus, I am just too darn tired. Some days it is enough to go for my walk and deal with daily life.

Therefore, I am bidding adieu to the muscle work and will just stick with the daily walks. I really wanted to be one of those pregnant women who doesn't let pregnancy interfere with exercise but marathon running prego lady, I am not. I am hoping that the muscles will not get too jiggly with their 4 to 5 month break and I will miss those tired muscles post workout. I think I will miss the skull crushers, pike on the swiss ball and Bulgarian split squats most of all. The one consolation though is that come March, I will know exactly what I need to do to get back in shape. Finding the time to do it, now THAT will be the challenging part I suspect.

Broken Arm Man and His Suave Brother

2011-09-27T13:51:00.000-07:00

(Drew, being Drew, wouldn't pose for me at all and instead insisted on covering his face)

Not this past weekend but the weekend before, Drew, his dad, and Ethan went off for a bike ride before dinner. Kevin, on the way out the door, grabbed his cell phone and told me jokingly that he would call if someone needed a rescue. About 10 minutes after they left, the phone rang and I picked up and immediately heard someone wailing in the background. Drew had fallen off his bike and Kevin said something seemed to be really wrong with his arm.

I jumped in the car and drove to where they were and found Drew sitting on the curb, white faced, crying and clutching his arm. When I got him to move his hand off his arm I could see that the elbow area was swollen already. We loaded him and his bike in the car and then headed off to the Insta Care.

Driving there, I was panicking a bit remembering the last time Drew had ever had to go to the emergency room. He was 4 and had fallen and cut his face and needed stitches. They gave him a sedative that instead of mellowing him, enraged him and then they strapped him into a papoose board. He screamed and wiggled out of that board like 5 times while they tried to stitch his face and all the while the assisting nurse kept sighing these big, irritated sighs. Finally, sick of that I looked that nurse dead in the eyes and said, "look, he is 4, your sedative didn't work, and I am sorry if it irritates you but he is just not going to calmly lay there while you poke needles in his face!" Amazingly, the nurse guy did a complete 180 and then was completely nice with Drew afterward. The whole thing was stressful to say the least.

We got to the Instacare and the poor guy was in a lot of pain and I was nervous about whether he would cooperate for x-rays or not. Fortunately, there is a big difference between 4 and almost 12 and he cooperated wonderfully with everything they wanted him to do. I was really proud of him. Also, very cutely, as he was laying on the exam table, in pain, waiting for the doctor to look at the x-rays, he looked at me and said, "how are you feeling mom?" Since I got pregnant, he has been super concerned about how I am feeling. Anyway, turns out he broke his humerus, right above the elbow. They put it in a splint and sling and instructed us to see an Orthopedic doctor on Monday for a cast.

He got casted Monday and returned to school Tuesday and came home with literally not one spare inch of space on that cast he had so many signatures. He was pumped about all the attention and all the "friends" who signed his cast.

In true Drew fashion, he is milking the broken arm for all it is worth. For the first few days it was casted he would refer to himself in the third person, like some professional athlete, as "broken arm man". Walking in the door from school, "broken arm man is home!", after dinner, "broken arm man needs help with his shirt" and so on. Kind of hilarious. For a few days he was refusing to use his other arm, insisting he couldn't close his car door or pick up any toys. I was like, "um, your right arm is perfectly fine!"

In other news, that same weekend, Ethan broke his glasses in two (I know, what next right?). We went off right away to order new ones but the poor guy had to spend that week at school blind. We let him pick his pair all by himself and I thought it was kind of cute that he had some definite ideas about what he thought looked good.

Here he is in the new spec's,

I think he looks super handsome and maybe a bit too cool for the rest of us in this family.

A Birthday and Some News

2011-09-15T14:16:00.000-07:00

My youngest, Ethan, turned 10 on Monday. I can't believe that many years have gone by since he was a little guy. It has really flown. He has grown into such an incredible boy. He is kind, he helps his brother a ton, he always does his best, he has a wicked sense of humor, he is a total foodie, and has a spirit of adventure. This boy wants to travel everywhere and he loves new things and places. I always joke that if I could bottle his disposition, I would be rich because he is so easy. Happy Birthday my little man!!!

Okay, now for some news. You may have noticed I have been slacking at the blogging recently. I have been a bit preoccupied with some big changes happening here at our house and well, in my body. I am 12 weeks pregnant, something that came as a total shock to Kevin and I. We were not trying to be pregnant and both of us really thought at first that the two pregnancy tests had to be wrong because we were doing things that are supposed to prevent pregnancy. Well, not only was it true but at my first doctor visit we found out there are two babies in there. Yes, twins! Insane, right?! So, the past few weeks I have been busy doing my impression of a person with narcolepsy and falling asleep at inappropriate times of the day along with trying not to vomit. I was no where near this sick with my other two pregnancies. I am still trying to get my head around the fact that we are going back to the baby stuff but all in all, we are really excited to have these two new little people in our family.

Sometimes I Actually WILL Claim Them as My Own

2011-08-25T13:07:00.000-07:00

Some people are all syrupy and gushy when talking about their kids and when listening to those people talk you have to resist the urge to throw up a bit - at least I do. Then you have my kind of people, the ones who are sarcastic and maybe a bit grumbly when it comes to talking about their kids. I think us sarcastic folk love our kids just as much be we are under no delusion that they are constantly wonderful and like to have fun with the ways they cause us grief.

That is my usual tack when talking about my kids but you are going to have to excuse me for a moment while I gush and be syrupy. I got an email today from my oldest son's special needs teacher that had me thinking he was pretty amazing. For those of you who are new readers and don't know us in real life, my oldest, Drew, was born with mild cerebral palsy and has some pretty significant developmental disabilities. He struggles with academics and well, lots of things.

This week in school the 6th grade, my son's grade, has been doing a special Outdoor Education week. Instead of staying at school, each day of this week the entire 6th grade class goes to a nearby state park where they kayak, hike, bike and rock climb with some learning thrown in. Drew is the only kid in the 6th grade who is part of the school's significant special needs (SSN) class and yesterday as part of the instruction, the class was given a lesson on disabilities and people with disabilities.

Drew's SSN teacher emailed me today and told me that during that discussion Drew raised his hand and told all the typical 6th grade kids what it is like to live with a disability, how learning is hard for him and how sometimes it is hard for him to say words right. She said there was not a dry adult eye and that the kids were totally fixed on him and listening to what he had to say.

I am so proud of him for feeling good enough about himself to share his experience and so for now, I am feeling a bit gushy.

At least until he comes home from school and tells me I am fired or makes shooting noises until I think my head will explode.

Able to Leap Tall Buildings in A Single Bound

2011-08-19T09:28:00.000-07:00

from here

Amazing how my kids can come from the same genes but be so different. My youngest child, well, that kid is practically a saint and I fully expect him to be canonized one day. He could be the patron saint of Lego's.

My oldest, hmph, that is another story. He is stubborn and likes to be in charge and is very vocal about his objections to things. No idea where he gets any of THAT from. He is also extremely messy so at any given moment, there is some area in our house that looks like it was bombed by the Toys R Us giraffe and it needs to be cleaned up by him. Typically, when I ask, there is a lot of grumbling before he gets down to work. Usually, like 2 minutes will go by and he will announce that he is done. I will go look and confirm my suspicion that our definitions of done are drastically different and set him to work once more. This process repeats itself usually 4 or 5 times before either the area is clean or I get tired of the whole thing and decide good enough will suffice.

Lately though, there has been a shakeup in this whole routine. As you may or may not recall, Drew did a special needs biking program this summer and learned to ride his bike. Every afternoon on our cul de sac, you can find any number of neighborhood kids riding up and down the street playing games on their bikes. With his new found biking skills, Drew is finally able to join the kiddie peleton and has become practically obsessed with being out there. So, everyday after school he comes home, throws down his backpack, announces that he doesn't need a snack, and heads out to bike.

It only took me a few days of this happening to see how I could use this to my advantage. Now, when he gets home, if I say, "yes, but before you go out you need to clean up your room". He is on it in a flash and with no complaints cleans every last bit of it up without me having to go in there 900 times to tell him he isn't done yet. This is the, by far, the best parenting thing that has happened to me in a while and I have to resist the urge to add a "mwuh, huh, huh, huh" (that would be an evil laugh) after issuing my instructions because I just feel so powerful all of the sudden.

I don't know what I am going to do when winter comes but right now I am enjoying my new found power and my cleaner house.

The Odd Couple - The Vizsla Version

2011-08-09T15:36:00.000-07:00

Since adding Tucker, the second Vizsla we have ever owned, to our family we can see some definite similarities between him and Ella. Things that must just be Vizsla-esque. They both get the zoomies and race around the house full speed. They are both very vocal and they both have the goofiest way of sitting on our steps, usually with the butt one level above the front legs.

That is where the similarities end though.

If Ella had a human incantation, I could totally picture her being a prima ballerina with a very tight bun. Totally intense, Natalie Portman in Black Swan intense, but instead of dancing it is squirrels and birds and patrolling the yard. She is also very particular and for a dog, she seems to have an interesting sense of propriety. She WILL not, no matter how thirsty, stoop to drinking from the toilet, she is picky about the food she eats, and one night when, unbeknownst to us, Tucker piddled a bit on Ella's dog bed she threw a fit. She was grumbling, pawing at the bed, dragging it with her teeth across the room and would not lay down. Finally we turned on the lights, saw the two little dribble spots and got her something else to sleep on.

This is quintessential Ella, regal, elegant, refined. She is also a bit aloof. She likes to get petted but on her terms and not for too long because being too crazy about the humans would just smack of desperation. Don't get me wrong, she has fun and can be crazy but she has standards at the same time.

And then there is Tucker.............

I almost don't need to say more, do I?

If Tucker had a human form, he would be a lovable slob of a tow truck driver named Frank who watches WWF wrestling with one hand down his pants and chip shrapnel all over the front of himself. He is a complete and utter slob. He drinks from the toilet even though his water dish is literally one foot away and then drips toilet water all over the house. He will eat anything and has. He is super easygoing and seems to care less about the birds and the squirrels. He would have no qualms about sleeping on a pee dribbled bed and he is completely desperate for attention from the humans.

In spite of their differences though, they love to play and hang out together and it seems to work. Ella occasionally gives him a look that seems to say, "you are so gross!" but fortunately he is also so lovable. The whole opposites attract I guess.

Banff National Park, Eh?

2011-08-05T09:30:00.000-07:00

We spent all of last week in Banff National Park in Canada. Kevin and I had been there about 12 years ago before we had kids but it was the boy's first trip there. They were both excited to see another country but I had to explain to them that unlike when we went to Europe last summer, nothing about Canada was going to seem all that different. Different money, some French on the signs and they say "eh" a lot, otherwise kinda like home.

While there we did lots of hiking and the boys even tackled a 7.4 mile hike, their longest distance yet, with no real complaints. The complaining did kick in though on a lung busting, 1,000 foot elevation gain in 1 mile, hike during which we also got rained on. I was complaining on that one too.

The last time we were in Banff, there was a hike we wanted to do but couldn't because the trail had been closed by park rangers due to a grizzly bear tracking hikers. On our last day this trip, we went to attempt that hike again. We knew it was grizzly bear area so the kids had bells on their backpacks (you want to make noise so you don't surprise the bears) and my father had an industrial sized can of bear spray. When we started the hike there were 3 men hiking just ahead of us and about 3/4 of the way to our destination, we met them at a bend in the trail coming back our direction. They said that just around the bend were a grizzly bear with two cubs. As much as I was curious to see what they looked like, we have lived around the mountains long enough to know that you don't mess around with any bear with babies. Sarah Palin uses her lame "mother grizzly" euphemism for a reason. We promptly turned around and headed back down the trail.

During our trip we saw tons of wildlife. The day we drove in, Kevin and I were talking about how in all the time we have spent collectively hiking, going to Yellowstone, camping (him not me), neither of us had ever seen a bear in the wild. Literally, like 5 minutes after that conversation what do we see by the side of the road but a black bear. We ended up seeing black bears on 3 different occasions, elk, big horn sheep, goats, marmots (my favorite), and tons and tons of chipmunks begging for food.

We also went canoeing twice while there, once in a river and once on Lake Louise. The boys and particularly Drew really loved paddling around in the canoes.

I took a ridiculous number of photos because it is so gorgeous there and here are some of the highlights and some wildlife shots.

The guys at Lake Louise.

In Johnston Canyon at the start of our longer hike.

Where we ended up at the end our our 7.4 mile hike. A gorgeous valley with a stream and some natural springs. Really amazing place!

Kevin and Ethan at Emerald Lake in Yoho National Park just over the border in British Columbia.

My favorite of the lakes in Banff, Peyto Lake and yes the water really is that strange turquoise color.

Stewart Canyon

A beautiful mountain valley on our last hike, right before we had to turn around because of the mama bear.

In the really popular tourist areas, the chipmunks are horrible beggars. At one point we were sitting on some rocks at Moraine Lake eating lunch and one particularly bold guy tried to get in my mother's pocket because there was trail mix in there.

One of the black bears we saw.

We visited a wolf sanctuary and this is Wiley, one of the wolves. While we were there all the wolves started howling in unison which was one of the coolest things I have heard.

A marmot. I love these guys. They are kind of fat looking, with that cute face and they have these really cool paws that are sort of like hands.

A goat family who are obviously in that oh, so awkward losing the winter coat stage of life.

An elk eating flowers by the side of the road.

On My Soapbox For a Moment

2011-07-20T07:29:00.000-07:00

For the past year and a half I have been volunteering once a week at Denver's Children's Hospital in the oncology unit playroom. I play with patients of all ages and try and help them remember that they are, first and foremost, kids. In my time volunteering, there have been some hard moments, the pediatric intensive care unit I was sent to once was a sight I think no parent could handle well. Standing in the room of an 18 year old patient who reminded me so, so much of my sister and who I was acting as a witness for her signing "do not resuscitate" paperwork had me feeling for a moment like I couldn't breathe.

This weekend brought another hard moment. On Sunday, I learned that a favorite patient of the entire unit, one who has been in that playroom practically every week for the past year, one who I have held on my lap countless times and who is the best little hugger around, lost her battle with her illness. Since then, I have been feeling sad and pissed at cancer and pissed at a universe where not all children get to become adults.

I can't tell you how much I wish I could make cancer go away. I can't do that but one thing I can do is encourage any of you reading to help in a way that we all can, sign up to be a bone marrow donor. I put myself on the registry years ago and last year, after hearing about a completely charming, cape wearing patient in desperate need of a bone marrow transplant, Kevin signed up as well.

It is a simple thing. You go here and they send you a kit in the mail. You swab your cheek and mail it back. Done. Easy and you could extend or save someones life. One popular misconception I want to clear up about donation is that if you are called to donate that you have to endure something painful. That used to be somewhat true; however, nowadays if you are a match almost 90% of the time there is no bone marrow taken out of your hip. Instead, they hook you up to this handy dandy machine that takes your blood, spins it extracting the needed parts, and puts the rest back in you. You go home the same day and you may have a headache but that is it.

So, if you knew and loved my sister, please consider signing up. If you love anyone with cancer, please consider signing up. If the thought of a pink slipper wearing, huggy 3 year old being gone from the world bothers you, please consider signing up. It would mean the world to me.

Summertime in the Mountains

2011-07-13T10:00:00.000-07:00

Summer is taking a bit of a toll on my blogging. I have lots of topics and things swirling in my brain but what is missing, courtesy of my two sidekicks, is the time to put any of it down in a coherent way. Instead, my time is currently being filled moderating such debates as who's turn it is to let Tucker out of his crate, or who is a faster runner, or whether the air in the back of the car should be set at full blast or low and trying to thwart Drew's efforts to fill my house with crap and thereby make himself the youngest person profiled on a Hoarders show. All of that seems to be a full time job. A ridiculous full time job but still. So, instead of something with a point, I am just going to bombard you with pictures.

I love living in Colorado and we love to spend time in the mountains in the summer. A week ago, in a fit of boredom, I took the boys up to the mountains and we hiked up to St. Mary's Lake and glacier. It is way high up, at 10,800 feet and is gorgeous.

Ethan loves to play around in the snow and next time, we need to bring our sled up with us.

Drew, looking begrudged because he hates me to take his picture. I had to bribe him to get him to pose for me here.

This past weekend, the whole family, including the furry members, spent the day up in Twin Lakes, near Leadville. Also high up, around 10,000 feet, and also stunning. It is one of those places that makes me wish I was a much better photographer than I am. We ate lunch by the lake and Tucker, who, unlike Ella, actually likes water, played some fetch in the water and tried his hand at swimming. He wasn't too sure about the deeper water stuff but loved playing in the shallow ends.

After lunch, we drove to the south end of the lake and hiked 2 miles to an old abandoned town called Interlaken. At the end of the 1800's it was a popular resort destination. In the early 1900's it fell out of favor and has been sitting there ever since. There is no road to it but if you hike the 2 miles, you can check out the leftover buildings and the house that belonged to the hotel owner is open and you can wander around inside. We had fun checking out the house and climbing up to the 3rd story cupola.

All in all, a great way to spend a Saturday. We left the house around 9:30 and didn't get home until around 6 and every single one of us, even the 5 month old, were pooped.

**On a side note, Grandpa Covington, thanks so much for sending the hats! The boys love them and are wearing them lots!**

Tucker at 5 Months

2011-07-01T15:19:00.000-07:00

Our vizsla puppy, Tucker (aka, Mr. Puppers, Pup Pup, Smuckers or Tuck Tuck - why have just one nickname) is now 5 months old. We have had him 2 months and he is such a great little guy. He is actually really easy to train because he is super tuned in to the people in the house and hates to get in trouble. He is far more clingy than Ella and follows me everywhere.

He is also super smart. If I have any errands or outings to do, I typically go in the morning after I have showered and gotten dressed for the day. The last thing I do before I am done getting ready is put on my jewelry and then Tucker goes in his crate and I leave. After about a week of this routine, one day as I reached for my watch, Tucker got up from where he was laying walked over to his crate and climbed in. I thought maybe it was a fluke and that he just wanted his bed in the crate. The next day, same thing and he has done this pretty much every day since. One day last week, I left the house in a rush and forgot to put on some of the jewelry I wear daily. Later in the day, I put on my necklace and Tucker wandered into the room, saw me and went straight for the crate, which had me laughing since I wasn't going anywhere.

Here is some video of Tucker bouncing around showing me his toy. He loves to have a toy in his mouth and then strut around with it or bounce around hoping someone will play.

Drew's A Biker & A New Family Member

2011-06-28T14:09:00.000-07:00

Last week, Drew participated in Lose The Training Wheels. LTTW is a national program that helps people with disabilities learn to ride a bicycle. Kevin and I had tried over the years to teach Drew to ride a bike but our attempts were met by a lot of fear and frustration. When I signed him up for the LTTW, I wasn't sure how successful it would be but figured it was worth a shot.

Every day last week, Drew, Ethan and I went to our local rec center (luckily, the only time LTTW is in Colorado this year it happens to be only 5 minutes from our house. Drew's classmates were from all over the state.) where Drew practiced riding for 75 minutes each day. There were only 8 kids in each session with 2 trainers and 3 volunteers per kid. The first few days they had Drew riding a bike with a roller thing in the place of the back tire. In the beginning, the roller is broad making it so the kids can't tip over. As the kids practice, the trainers swap out the roller for more and more tapered ones gradually giving them the feel of needing to balance.

By day 3, they had Drew riding a two-wheel bike with support from his volunteers but during that same day, he moved from that to this.....

And then to this.......

(While you are watching this, listen to the dad yelling instructions at his daughter. From day one of the program this guy was telling her constantly what she needed to do better or that "it doesn't count if you don't do it right" and in my video here you can hear her crying saying she is trying. By the 4th day of this, I told Kevin not to be surprised if I were arrested on Friday for trying to strap a muzzle on that guy. Just let the kid be successful for a minute for crying out loud!)

He was so proud of himself and Kevin, me, and Ethan are all really proud too and excited to bike together as a family.

The last day, they had a BBQ where the kids were presented with trophies and they got to show off their new biking skills riding with our local motorcycle police. Drew loved the police officers and they were super friendly with him and even let him sit on a motorcycle. Drew also had to tell them that his "mom was caught by them" and Kevin was teasing me about whether I recognized any of them. Ha ha!

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In other exciting news, I am thrilled to announce the arrival of my newest niece!

Naomi April Rehmert

June 26, 2011

6 lb. 13 oz.

In what is typical behavior for the Icelandic side of our family, she was impatient and arrived 2 weeks early. She was breech and unable to be flipped (family stubbornness showing already perhaps) and was delivered via c-section, a sight that my brother-in-law Nate never wants to see again. Mom, dad and baby are all doing well and I can't wait until we can meet her in August. Drew was very jealous that grandma got to hold her already and is dying to get his hands on her.

A Trip To My Hometown

2011-06-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

Last week, I met my cousin Amy, aka, my surrogate sister, in Chicago. She was headed there to attend a company conference and invited me to come along as her guest. I was super excited because I grew up in the suburbs of Chicago but my parents moved when I was in college so I don't get back there nearly as often as I would like.

Here is a little photo tour of my trip.

The first night we were there we went to a Cubs game. The company had rented out a rooftop facility where we could have dinner and watch the game. Thank goodness for that because it was about 60 degrees outside and pouring rain. Amy and I hung out for a bit but left before the game, which was delayed for weather, even started. Yep, we aren't big baseball people.

The view from our hotel room of the Chicago river and the Wrigley Building, one of my favorites.

Chicago has a bunch of great architecture and one morning while Amy was in meetings I walked around and visited some of the buildings I love and the parts of the city I love. This is the art deco style Carbon and Carbide building built in the early 1900's. This is probably my favorite building in the entire city and I love when the gold on the top shines in the sun. This building currently houses the Hard Rock Hotel which bugs me for some reason. Hard Rock Hotel = Lame; Carbon & Carbide Building = amazing. They just don't go together.

This is the "Bean" in Millennium Park. This was added to the park after I moved away for college and when I first saw pictures of it and heard about it, I kind of thought it sounded lame. But it is actually pretty cool to see the city skyline reflected back as you walk around the bean.

When I am in Chicago, if I am anywhere near State Street in the Loop, I always stop in what used to be the Marshall Fields store, now Macy's, and pay homage to the Louis Comfort Tiffany mosaic that is there. There is a 7 story atrium on the main floor of the store with the mosaic at the top. It was built in the early 1900's and has over a million pieces of glass. Pictures can't capture how gorgeous it is.

Funny story, while in Macy's admiring Tiffany's handiwork, a few steps from the atrium was an area of Lush products. My kids love Lush bath bombs so I stepped over there to buy some stuff. While I was there, I was chatting with one of the employees about the products and mentioned coming in to see the mosaic. She says, "what mosaic?" So I walked her literally 6 feet over from the place she works every, single, day and told her to look up. I thought was kind of hilarious that she works there daily and never knew that there was such a gorgeous thing up above her head.

This ends the photo tour because my camera battery died. (Note to self, check batteries before leaving on a trip). While in town, Amy and I also caught a Blueman group show where I lost 50% of my hearing but had fun doing it, did a service project building bikes for inner city kids with her company, and went to a dinner at the Museum of Science and Industry where we learned about tornado's, played mind games (actual mind games not some passive aggressive stuff), and Amy dared to try the machine that takes your picture and ages you. She is going to look pretty darn good at 75. There was also tons of talking late into the night, eating food that wouldn't qualify as "clean" by any stretch, and some shopping squeezed in here and there.

It was a great time and I loved seeing the city and hanging out with my amazing cousin. Thanks Amy for inviting me!!

Putting Fear In It's Place

2011-06-10T10:00:00.000-07:00

source

There was a period of time some years ago where I became afraid of flying. I have been flying since before I can even remember and my family has always traveled so I have gotten on a plane at least once a year for my entire life and it never bothered me. Then suddenly, every bump, every weird noise, every seat not bolted to the plane floor (word to the wise, never, I repeat never, fly a regional carrier in South America), had me breathing hard and putting a death grip on my husband's leg.

Was it a rational fear?  No. I knew that I was more likely to die driving my car than in a plane. I knew that turbulence is the equivalent of hitting a bump in the road while driving and doesn't bring down a plane. I knew all that but still told myself there was something to be afraid of. Eventually, I got over it and now Kevin can sit next to me without getting the circulation to his leg cut off.

The reason I bring it up now is that lately, I have been thinking quite a bit about fear and how irrational it sometimes is but yet we let those feelings hold us back or cause us angst. If you look at a very young child, it is apparent that we are born into this world open to all things and unafraid. Through experience, we figure out what to be afraid of or, more importantly perhaps, what we feel like we need to protect in ourselves and it seems like those impressions are made before we even have the perspective to know if they are justified or not.

I think it is safe to say that everyone of us has fears. Maybe you are afraid of rejection, or of not being in control, or of not being worthy of love, or of exposing your inner self, or of being weak. Whatever it is, we all have them and they can turn into very powerful influences in our lives. The amazing part too is that certain things we are well aware we are afraid of and other things are so ingrained that we don't even recognize it as a fear.

In my own self, I can see how at times I have let certain fears motivate me in one direction or a fear will have me deciding something is a certain way before I have even tested it out to see if that is, in fact, a truth. For example, two years ago when things really fell apart with my back and I was in horrendous pain day after day after day, I started telling myself that my life was over. That it was never going to go away.  Had any doctor told me that? No. Did I know that those things were implicitly true? No. But I can't tell you how much time I spent being upset and angry and depressed over something that I didn't really know to be fact. Kind of a waste of time and energy in hindsight and two years later I know my life was not over and okay, the pain hasn't completely gone away but I am soooooo much better.

Is it possible to totally eradicate our fears? I don't think so because some of them are necessary but I would love to get to a place where when fear shows it's face, I can say, "hello fear, I see you there but you are not in charge." Because I do believe that if you stare something in the face long enough, it loses it's power.

In thinking about all of this, I am working really hard to see my fears for what they truly are and to be open to what the universe throws my way without deciding one thing or another about it.  Just like me no longer getting on a plane convinced that if I am not in control of it something bad will happen (btw how crazy IS that anyway because, um, I have no idea how to fly so how would it be better if I was in control?), I am working to NOT be convinced of things that I don't know are true in every aspect of my life. I can't say it is always easy or that it isn't sometimes frightening but it is something that I really see as being worth the effort.

A Week In Which I Actually Hold a Coherent Thought In My Head

2011-06-07T16:13:00.000-07:00

A week ago, we left the kids in Utah to hang out with their grandparents. After 11 years of parenting, it is kind of strange, but in a totally good way, to be child free for an extended period of time.

Now that both boys are in school most of the day, I am used to filling my time from 8:30 until 3:30 and usually a good portion of that time is devoted to cleaning up messes related to small boys, or running errands related to small boys, or doing laundry created by small boys (one of them, who shall remain nameless but I know you all can guess who, creates about 3/4 of the laundry because he likes to change almost as much as a presenter at the Oscar's). Without them around, I have to say there is kind of a strange, Twilight Zone type, feeling in the air when 3:30 rolls around. Without the backpack bomb shrapnel to clean up, the snack crumbs to wipe and the homework to ~~push,~~ I mean encourage, people to get through, I don't know what to do with myself. But trust me, I will find a way to suffer through and fill that time.

So, after a week sans children, I was reflecting on what I really enjoy about them not being around (gosh, that sounds kind of cold and heartless but you people with kids, you know exactly what I mean, don't you?).

Here is what is cool about being child free:

- I can eat my oatmeal in the morning and watch the news in complete peace instead of having to crank the t.v. volume to an ungodly level because someone is flying a fighter jet, complete with sound effects, around my head while asking me over and over again when he is going to have to get dressed. Complete peace people! It is not to be underrated. Matt Lauer actually forms complete sentences, who knew?!

- Kevin and I can eat salad for dinner without me having to make some pasta or carb filler because both my boys seem to have a hollow leg and would surely die of hunger if served merely leaves with some chicken on top. And there is no complaining at dinner about whatever I decided to fix.

- If I decide I want to leave the house after 3:30 p.m., I don't have to beg, plead and bribe the two homebodies before leaving. I just grab my purse and walk out the door.

- Kevin and I can actually converse at dinner AND stay in bed on the weekend as long as we feel like it without that same fighter jet flying around our room.

- Finally, when I pick up the house and the bathrooms are clean, things actually stay clean! It is astounding and really a beautiful thing.

Now, all that being said, I still do miss the rugrats and all their hi jinks. I miss the hugs, the funny questions or comments, Drew's smile and Ethan's cackle of a laugh, the mystery of never knowing what I will find in the washer after a cycle, and just generally constantly having my ~~minions~~, ahem, children around. They do kind of fill up the house in a way that is irreplaceable. (By the way, grandparents reading, that is in no way to be interpreted to mean that I can't part with them for a week or two. Just to be clear and you guys are the best for having them to stay with you.)

A Weekend at Sundance Resort and My Baby Sister Gets Hitched

2011-06-02T14:12:00.000-07:00

We left last Friday to spend a long weekend at Sundance Resort in Utah and to see my sister get married. We rented a cabin right near Sundance with my parents. The cabin was full of cowboy and indian type decor and the boys had fun trying on the various cowboy hats strewn about the house.

Ethan getting his cowboy on.

Drew posing with a stuffed bear found in the cabin.

When we had booked our trip, we had great plans to do some hiking in the area but the weather was not cooperative. It was in the 40's and rainy so instead of hiking, on Saturday, we took a drive to Park City to do some shopping and eat lunch. While we were there, Ethan made a new friend.

We spent the rest of the weekend hanging out, going to a rehersal dinner, visiting Kevin's parents in Salt Lake and spending time with my sister and her family to be.

On the day of the wedding, two days before June I might add, we woke up to snow, which made Ethan happy because he could do this,

Fortunately, by wedding time the snow had melted but it was still hailing and raining off and on so my sister's outdoor wedding got moved inside.

We got all dressed up, even the boys, and headed off to watch my sister get married and to have dinner afterward.

Here are Kevin and I all dressed up AND with somewhere to go. I bought my dress months ago when I thought it would be warm by the end of May so I was happy that we were going to be sitting inside for the nuptials.

My sister and I before the ceremony. In case you are wondering, that bump in her dress isn't just a large burrito she had for lunch but rather a baby girl due in July.

My dad walking my sister down the aisle. They are both laughing here because my mother, from her seat, was admonishing them for moving too fast.

The newly married couple right after being pronounced man and wife. My sister, who hadn't eaten much all day and was starving, is looking directly at the hors d'oeuvres table in this shot.

After the wedding, we were all stuffed and tired but Drew livened things up doing some Risky Business style dancing in the kitchen of our cabin.

As you can probably tell, he has some sweet dance moves in his repertoire. The next day, Kevin and I got in the car to head home while the boys stayed behind to spend a little over a week with their grandparents and cousin.

Hooping It Up, Native American Song, and Me With a Change

2011-05-24T10:06:00.000-07:00

Last week, we had a few things going on and I wanted to share some pictures.

In the community we live in, we are fortunate to have many recreation centers that offer classes for kids. They also have a bunch of classes specially geared toward kids with special needs. Recently, we signed Drew up to do a special needs basketball team.

In what is typical Drew fashion, the first day he had the class, he was nervous and was saying he did not want to go. We got there and he met the teacher and some of the kids and was all smiles. When I came back to get him, he was again all smiles and as I walked in the room, he was yelling across the court to me, "look at all my friends!" Then as we got in the car he started telling me he hated it and was never going back again. Such the way things go with him.

Incidentally, he did go back and he really seems to be enjoying it. Last week, Kevin came home from work a bit early and we sat and watched Drew play. He is really good and made several baskets that night.

Also last week, Ethan's class did a presentation of Native American songs and games. We teased him a bunch prior to the event about whether he was going to go native and wear a loin cloth or something but he kept his pants on and did a great job singing his songs.

Last Friday, after much debate and going back and forth in my head, I finally committed and made a change.

I went from this:

To this:

I have had shorter hair before but when my stylist made the first few cuts, I have to admit I was freaking out a bit. It just takes so long to grow. But now, after a few days of having this shorter cut, I am loving it and loving that it takes less time to blow dry.

All Those Hats On My Head

2011-05-18T14:02:00.000-07:00

Mother's wear lots of hats. We are chauffeurs, cooks, housekeepers, toxic waste removers (i.e. diapers), psychologists, teachers, disciplinarians and so much more. Last week, in getting ready for Drew's annual IEP meeting (for those of you who don't know an IEP is the annual education plan for a child who requires extra support in school), I was thinking about all those different things that I do for my children and how, for my special need's child, there are a few extra, unique hats that I wear.

For both of my children, I do some public relations, if you will. Helping them navigate new or sticky social situations but really more so for Drew. His entire academic career, I have tried to volunteer in his class or show up at lunch here and there because for one thing, it gives me an opportunity to field questions from the other kids. One of my personal favorites back in 1st grade was, "where did you get him?" I have often wondered that same thing myself.

Another way I can help him socially is to point out to the other kids how despite the obvious differences, in a lot of ways, Drew is just like them. Once at lunchtime, I was chatting to the kids sitting around Drew and one boy seemed shocked to learn that Drew played baseball. The boy played baseball and it seemed to rock his world in a way to learn that Drew did that same thing.

About a month ago I stopped in to have lunch with my guy and as I was wedging my 6 foot frame into the child sized picnic-type lunch table, I heard the girl across from Drew say to another girl, "THAT is Drew's mom? She is really pretty!" While I was flattered, I also had to laugh at how surprised this girl sounded that Drew could come from normal looking people.

See, public relations at work.

Through our navigating this special needs world and trying to find answers and diagnosises earlier on, I have also played the role of gatekeeper of all that information. More so in the past but there have been countless therapists, specialists, doctors, psychologists all, with good intentions mind you, yamming in my ear about what he can and can't do in the present and sometimes with some dire sounding predictions for the future. My job is to sift through all of that and decide which parts make sense or matter for my son and for how we approach things with him.

I also get to play gatekeeper to all the comments and platitudes that people throw my way in an effort to try and make sense, mostly for themselves I think, of a child with disabilities. I can't tell you how many times I have heard how I have been "blessed" by God in being given a child with special needs and how much that makes me feel like people are really minimizing the whole situation or trying to give me some sort of consolation prize. Or how much any comment that has the phrasing "those kids" in it drives me batty.

Another big role I play for Drew is advocating for him or if you want to make it sound much more snazzy than it really is, you could say I am his agent. Just last week I sat down with 7 people from the school district and we worked through what Drew's education plan for next year will be. This is my big opportunity to make sure Drew gets the support that he needs in order for him to contine to be educated. I fully represent him and his best interest in these meetings.

"My client will have 30 minutes of direct speech therapy a week. My client will not be left unsupported in the general education classroom. My client wants only orange Skittles in his classroom cubby."

Something like that.

Yeah, there are some extra hats involved in parenting a special needs child but I think of how amazing that boy is and despite the hard moments, he is worth the extra weight of those additional hats.

An Upswing

2011-05-11T08:05:00.000-07:00

After last week's cold/flu thing and feeling a bit like the universe hated me, this past weekend and week are feeling really good. My weekend consisted of homemade cinnamon rolls the size of my face, yum.

A "date" with Drew while Ethan was at a movie with friends. My hubby, who spent part of the weekend out of town for a funeral, arrived back Sunday morning, which made me very happy because I missed him. Since it was almost 90 outside we all went for a walk on the bluff near our home, a place that I love because it has 360 degree views of downtown Denver, Pikes Peak, the mountains and Colorado's plains.

I got some nice Mother's Day gifts and then everyone made me dinner. Drew, being Drew, complained about how making dinner was such a trial for him because he was tired (he is so giving) which made me laugh and I reminded him that I make dinner every, single, night, tired or not. Not surprisingly, I got no sympathy for that comment. He also had me laughing telling me that since it was Mother's Day, I needed to be extra nice to HIM. We had to explain how he kind of had that backwards.

All in all, a great weekend and a wonderful Mother's Day. I missed seeing my own mother who decided traipsing around Africa was better than staying home to get a lame card and some flowers from me.

Mom at Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe. Oh and can I just say how is it that at 64 she seems to have fewer wrinkles than me? Totally unjust in my opinion!

Despite her absence, I did get to send her an email and let her know what a great mama she is and how much I love her.

In other good news, Tucker, or Mr. Puppers as I have started calling him, finally seems to be getting this whole pee outside concept which means my days of going outside hourly and then saying in a ridiculous voice, "good pee-pee" are numbered. It's a good thing too because he chewed the cord to our Spotbot last week while I was in the shower completely eliminating my ability to really clean up any accidents.

WWF Smackdown Vizsla Style

2011-05-06T10:07:00.000-07:00

This goes on pretty much whenever they are both awake. I like how Ella just pretty much lays there and lets Tucker do all the bouncing around and pouncing.

A few days ago I came home and Ella followed me upstairs to Tucker's crate. I was thinking, "wow, she is really excited to see me!" Instead, we get to the crate and she starts pawing it and crying. She just wanted me to release her play buddy.

*On a side note, in case you are wondering the music we were listening to is Band of Horses and the song is The Funeral. Excellent song in my opinion.

Trying to Adjust My Attitude

2011-05-05T10:29:00.000-07:00

I have been having one of those weeks where I feel like I just want to get in bed, cram a pillow over my face and be done. Strange thing though is that I feel like that but really nothing terribly horrendous has really happened this week.

Here is the recap:

                                                    from here

Kevin and I both have a heinous cold/flu thingy going on.

                                                                          from here

I got a speeding ticket. I would like to say it was my first or that I haven't had one in a million years but none of that is true. Moral of the story, I need to drive slower.

                                          from here

And, I chipped one of my front teeth. The only recurring dream I have is one where I completely lose one of my front teeth, I go to the dentist and he tells me there is nothing I can do but look like a backwater hillbilly. Horrifying! Fortunately, it was just a tiny chip and just needed to be smoothed out but it made me feel old.

Also, my back is driving me nuts but nothing new there.

See, nothing so horrible which makes me thing think I may need to adjust my attitude a bit. So, inspired by my friend Carol, who finds 10 positives everyday, here are the positives of this week.

Tucker, or the Pupster as I like to call him, had his first case of the "zoomies". If you have a Vizsla, you know the "zoomies" all too well but for those of you non V owners, the "zoomies" are when your V decides to run full blast in a circle inside or outside the house. They run at top speed for an indeterminate amount of time and then just like that it is over. The zoomies always make me laugh but Tucker with the "zoomies" had Kevin and I cracking up because he is so clumsy.

Kevin and I celebrated 15 years of marriage yesterday. We went up to Beaver Creek a few weekends ago for our anniversary so we weren't going to do anything but he came home with these

and I made him a coconut cream pie that he likes. After the kids went to bed we enjoyed a piece of pie and a cup of Theraflu and tried to see who could use the most tissues in an hour's time (I think Kevin won that one).

Another plus, we planted our first vegetable garden this year. I am a total black thumb. In fact, when my parents recently spent a few months in Italy, I was, in a major lapse of judgement, put in charge of my mom's orchids during her absence. I think there were like 6 to begin with and in what seemed like a horticultural version of Agatha Christie's "And Then There Were None", I slowly killed each and every one of them. So I am excited to see our little garden growing.

One last positive, I am on a roll here, I had both my children cracking up this morning in the car as I was singing to the radio as loud as I could with my squeaky, hoarse, cold ravaged voice. I love making them laugh.

See, really not so bad when you change what you focus on.

Banana Bread & Something That Will Make You Say, "Awwww"

2011-04-29T09:54:00.000-07:00

I have always liked quick breads. Really they are more like cakes in loaf form but I can tell myself it is only bread I am eating and what's not to like about that? I still have fond memories of the banana bread served at my dorm cafeteria in college. Really tasty and being that it wasn't the cafeteria's usual compilation of mystery meats, one of the few safe items available to eat.

Yesterday, Ethan was home sick from school so I spent the day at home not running errands (okay, we did make one trip to Whole Foods for ragu ingredients and milk). It is amazing how much I can get done when forced to stay at home. Between my 5,000 (not even exaggerating) potty training trips outside with Tucker, I got lots of cleaning done, had time to try a new ragu sauce which takes many hours on the stove, and finally turned our browning bananas into some banana bread.

This is my favorite banana bread recipe from Bon Appetit. It takes banana bread up a notch with cinnamon, honey and a streusel topping and if you like banana bread I suggest giving it a try.

Now for the "awwww" factor. Last weekend, in a midday lull, the kids were playing and Kevin and I were lounging. I was playing Sudoku on Kevin's phone while Kevin was watching t.v. After a bit, I look up and see this,

the pupster and Kevin napping together. So adorable, both of them!

Tough Questions At An Early Hour And A Young Age

2011-04-27T13:46:00.000-07:00

This parenting stuff is sometimes hard. Anyone who says otherwise is either in major denial or is on mind-altering medication. This morning as the boys and I were going through our morning routine, I couldn't help noticing that my oldest seemed a bit off. He was going all food diva on me claiming his waffles weren't cooked right and were thereby rendered inedible. His pants felt funny and couldn't be worn. He didn't want to buy lunch at school but all the options I was giving him to take weren't good either.

By the time we got to the lunch issues, it finally dawned on me that something was up so, I said to him, "are you alright?"

He burst into tears and told me he was sad about a classmate whose mother is dying from cancer. (He was made aware of this a few weeks ago when the social worker talked to the class about it.)

Crying, Drew said to me, "Natalie is not going to have a mother anymore." I told him that she will always have a mother even if her mother can't be here anymore. I explained to him that it is very rare for a person to get cancer so young and that most mothers don't die young. I gave him a big hug and was feeling good that I was able to get him talking about what was bothering him.

Then, he says to me, "why do people have to die?"

I go immediately from feeling like I have a handle on the situation to feeling something like this:

from here

I am stumped wondering how I help him make sense of people dying early. I know that he is looking for a reason for a mother to die, something that makes what is happening for his classmate logical. I get that he is looking to know that the universe somehow makes sense and is not unfair because the flip side of that is terrifying.

I am coming up empty. Even after having 23 years to ponder that exact question with regard to my sister's death, the only thing I can make sense of is that this kind of thing just doesn't make sense. All those platitudes about it being someone's time or God having a special plan for them don't provide any answers or explanation. Not when you are the loved one left behind.

So, I give him the best that I have got, the truth.

"I don't know."

Rachel Zoe, I Am Not

2011-04-25T14:04:00.000-07:00

My little sister Tiffany is getting married on the very last day in May. Her wedding is going to be a small, casual affair outside at Sundance Resort in Utah. Absolutely one of my favorite places.

Once she set a date for her wedding, I went on the hunt for a dress. Nothing too fancy, since it is a casual wedding, something outside appropriate and summery. I don't know what dress shopping is like for other women but at 6 feet tall, finding a dress that has a hemline that isn't obscene or a built in waist that doesn't hit somewhere in the middle of my chest area, is a challenge. After trying on lots of duds, finally a few weeks ago on a shopping trip with my mother, I found it.

**On a side note here, I highly recommend shopping with a buddy because let's face it, if you are going to try on some seriously hideous dresses it is much more fun to have someone along to laugh at them with. At one point in our trip, we were at a department store, sharing a dressing room. I had put the top half of my dress on but had left my pants on waiting to see if the top worked before I totally got undressed, my mother had gotten into a real "don't" of a dress but then with her arthritic shoulder was having trouble getting out. So I said, "Let me get my pants off and then I will get you out of that dress".

I paused for a moment and then mumbled, "Definitely a sentence I have never uttered before" and then we both burst out laughing and couldn't stop for quite some time. (Dress shopping does make one slightly lose their grip on reality). **

Okay, back to the story, so I ended up getting this little number from JCrew,

Now, I need to accessorize, a word that kind of makes me cringe. I like fashion and as a teenager used to pore over every issue of Vogue. I read my InStyle regularly. I know that Thakoon is not a fancy name for a typhoon, or that Blumarine is not the name of an aquarium. I know what I like and don't like but where I struggle is putting things together. I can pick the fundamentals but figuring out what to put with those things gets me stuck. I totally need a stylist.

In a total admission of defeat, I wear the same accessories every day.

One stainless steel watch, one platinum wedding band, a silver necklace my husband bought me, a silver bangle and silver earrings. Every now and then, when I am feeling wild and crazy, I will change the earrings or put on a different necklace or bracelet.

Not helping things is the fact that I live in Colorado. A place where people buy a lot of their clothes at the REI and aren't really known for pushing the fashion envelope. Definitely not a place to provide any inspiration.

So now, what to do with the dress? I can pretty much guarantee, I will spend the next month trying to figure out what kind of statement necklace to get or which type of shoes would be cool but if I were a betting girl, I would say the Vegas odds are in favor of the combination above.

By the way, if anyone has any suggestions, I am totally ~~desperate~~ open.

No Need For A Sleep Aid Here

2011-04-22T13:22:00.000-07:00

We have been in full puppy mode since Tuesday afternoon when we welcomed 13 week old Tucker to our house. He seems to have a great little personality and is really interested in what we, the humans, are doing which will make training just a little bit easier.

He and Ella have been getting along better and better each day. At first, I think she was a little unsure who this newcomer was and what to do with him but they have been wrestling a lot and playing in the yard and lately on our hourly trips outside, he is following her around instead of me.

Between the playing, the hourly bathroom trips outside, the daily walk down the street to get used to the leash, the getting to know all the sounds around the house, and the frequency of no's being thrown his way, by the end of the day, the poor guy is wiped out.

He isn't the only one. Ella is all tuckered (maybe I should say Tuckered) out by days end. Whipping a newbie into shape is tough work. As for me, well by about 8 p.m. I pretty much feel how Ella looks here. Let's just say I am sleeping like a baby with all this running around after the little guy.

A Wiggly Four Legged Distraction

2011-04-20T09:52:00.000-07:00

Last Wednesday night I totally mucked up my back. As is typical, I have no real clue what I did except for I had been feeling really great the past month and I am pretty darn sure that there was some overdoing it involved. Since Wednesday night, I have been dealing with the pain and stiffness and trying to heal from whatever ridiculous thing happened. I have also been feeling pissed and sad and frustrated but yesterday the most amazing distraction arrived.

No, it can't cure my back problems.

No, I didn't buy it off a late night infomercial.

No, it is not just a boatload of Vicodin, a Diet Coke and a pile of dark chocolate (even though I have to say that all sounds pretty good right at the moment).

It IS a 12 pound, four-legged bundle of energy.

Meet our newest family member.

Kevin and I were up in Beaver Creek for a long weekend and when we got home Monday afternoon, there was a call from Vizsla Rescue saying that had gotten in a male puppy. He was taken by the state of Kansas from a hoarder. Kevin and I drove an hour and a half north of our home yesterday afternoon to pick him up from his foster mom. He is super sweet and his puppy dorkiness has been making us laugh pretty regularly since bringing him home. The kids are totally over the moon about him and last night we all picked a name we liked, put the names in a hat, and drew one out. Ethan's choice of Tucker won the draw. Ella seems to like him alright so far and has already gotten him chasing her around the yard and wrestling in the house. I have a feeling her lessons in counter-surfing and forbidden furniture sitting are next.

My Furry, Wet-Nosed Co-Pilot

2011-04-13T16:31:00.000-07:00

Some people have God as their co-pilot, I have a 3 year old Vizsla.

Since Polka Dot died a few months ago, Ella seems to not like being left home alone so I take her in the car quite a bit more. The fur and the window goobs don't do much for the look of my interior but she loves it and is excellent in the car. She sits in the passenger seat almost like a person and let's face it, window goobs aside, I do enjoy being treated like a hero when I return from inside Target.

Oftentimes, I take her to drop the kids at school or to pick them up. When I drop them off, she always cries when they walk away and when I pick them up, she watches for them so carefully and cries in anticipation of seeing her two boys. Once she saw a boy far off about Ethan's size also with brown hair and glasses and she got really excited, tail wagging, body wiggling, and then was so disappointed when she realized it wasn't him.

Here she is waiting today:

And then, she finally spots Ethan.......

The kids love when I bring her because as happy as I am to see them at the end of the day, my enthusiasm can't match a wiggling, wagging, licking ball of fur.

A Missing Sock Connundrum and A Firing

2011-04-07T13:55:00.000-07:00

Every weekend I do all our laundry and at the end of it all, I always end up with this,...............

.....a pile of socks whose match has somehow managed to vanish into thin air in the space of a week. This week, you will notice that there are a staggering 7 pairs with no match, 2 of which are Ethan's beloved toe socks that Grandma and Grandpa brought him from Japan. Seven pairs with no match for two boys who together wear 14 pairs a week. So if I remember my statistics from college, that means that half of the time one or both absent minded boys put one sock in the laundry basket and the other God knows where.

So, I look under beds, under couches, outside (if you knew my oldest that would make perfect sense) and any other spot I can possible conceive of a sock being. I may find one or two but never all of them. Where they all go is a complete mystery. Probably out there somewhere with Jimmy Hoffa and D.B. Cooper.

from here

But, none of that is really my concern anymore because Tuesday night at dinner, Drew told me that I was fired from being his mother. I think that was an attempt by him to make me feel bad but all I was thinking was, Sweet! No more washing everyone's clothes, no more cooking things people complain about, no more cleaning up toys to turn around and clean them up again and again and again, no more suffering through homework, no more getting chewed out for cutting a tortilla wrong (because really, who am I to cut first without asking, right? The audacity), no more having to watch Dirty Jobs, no more of any of that. Doesn't sound too bad.

Of course, within the hour he had me back on the job heating him up a piece of pound cake and examining the minuscule scratch on his finger to determine if he is going to live or not.

A Pincushion Update

2011-04-04T09:41:00.000-07:00

from here

On Tuesday last week, I tried acupuncture for the first time. After having needles placed in my hand and back, it relieved some pain but made me horribly sore everywhere on Wednesday.

On Friday, I went back for my second appointment. The acupuncturist wanted to needle me, as he calls it, in my back again but I was nervous about that after Wednesday's soreness. He said he could achieve the same effect needling only my hand and a spot between my nose and upper lip. He said the spot in the face is a very powerful spot for back pain. Despite being nervous about having a needle in my face, I thought that seemed better than having it near my nervy disc. I agreed but told him that if I felt that needle on my teeth at ALL, he could expect see a grown woman running around the room yelling, "get it out! get it out!" over and over again.

Duly warned, he went to work. Before placing the needles, he felt around on my back asking about which areas hurt when touched. Then he placed needles in my hand and the one in my face.

While I sat there, he asked me about what my diet is like. I described what types of foods I eat and then he pinched my upper arm and my waist and said, "your fat layer is not good". He went on to say I need to eat more sweets and greasy foods to increase my fat layer. That made me laugh especially since I got the sweets category covered and the term "fat layer" made me feel like I should be barking for fish and balancing a ball on my nose.

After having the needles in about 15 minutes he felt around on my back again. Before the needles, I had about 10 different areas near my spine where there was pain when touched after the needles being in, there were only 2 where I felt any pain. So bizarre.

After my appointment, I felt great and continued to feel great the rest of the day. I felt normal and it was an amazing feeling to be free of any pain or discomfort.

Sadly, by Saturday afternoon, pain and discomfort returned and I spent the weekend in a bit of a funk feeling like there is no hope for me escaping the pain that is my life in this body. Kevin reminded me that my discomfort and pain returning does not mean it will always be there and I think I will certainly give the acupuncture a few more tries and see if that amazing freedom I felt Friday can be something that lasts longer.

A Friday Mashup

2011-04-01T10:19:00.000-07:00

When the kids were in Utah last week with Grandpa, he took them to an area climbing wall. Ethan loves to climb and whenever we go hiking we all have to wait on the trail while he scales practically every boulder we pass. I wonder at times if he is part mountain goat but I have seen his stinky feet plenty of times and there is no evidence whatsoever of cloven hooves.

Here is Drew scaling the wall. He is a more nervous climber as you can tell by his patented "I am freaking out" look on his face. Despite the nerves, he still went ahead and conquered the wall.

And, here is the mountain goat going to the tip top of the tallest part of the climbing wall, naturally.

On Wednesday of this week, we ventured down to Colorado Springs to the Cave of the Winds. We have lived in Colorado for almost 10 years and I have literally only been to the Springs once so we decided it is time to do some exploring down there. The cave was pretty interesting but a totally different experience then our visit to Fulford Cave a few years ago.

Drew and Ethan in the cave. After being warned by the tour guide that touching any part of the cave will get you a $2,500 fine, notice how Drew is keeping his hands safely in his pockets.

Here is Ethan posing by a column inside the cave, again trying really hard not to touch anything.

Both guys trying on the miners helmets in the cave gift shop. While we were in the Springs, we also stopped by the visitor's center at the Air Force Academy which Drew loved as he is into all things military these days.

Today is our last day of spring break (does it make me a bad mother if I do a little cheer?). I am off in about an hour to work on my human pincushion impersonation again. After my visit to the acupuncturist Tuesday, I was really achy everywhere on Wednesday and I am hoping to not get that again today. But the bony spot doesn't hurt anymore.

Also today, my parents dropped off their lab, Lola to stay again while they are off to San Diego. We will also be dog sitting for 3 weeks in May while my parents trot off to Africa. Later today I am going to help Lola complete her emancipated minor paperwork because clearly, if they leave her so much, she needs a more stable home environment.

My Human Pincushion Experience

2011-03-30T07:04:00.000-07:00

photo from here

Yesterday, I went and tried acupuncture for the first time. A woman Kevin works with tried it for her back recently and had some really good results so yesterday when I woke up with this bony spot on the back of my pelvis killing me, I thought it was time to give it a try. I will admit being a little nervous as I am with anything involving my back because while I am all for reducing pain, I am also wary of anything that could potentially increase pain. I was also worried a bit about looking like the guy in the picture above.

I walked into the clinic and literally felt like I was not in Kansas anymore. Everything on the walls was in Chinese, the people were all Chinese and speaking Chinese, the intake form was in Chinese with some English underneath and then there I was in the middle of all of this, a super tall, blonde, white woman. Felt a bit conspicuous and like the "One of these things is not like the other" music should be playing.

I talked to the doctor about where I have pain, he performed some physical assessment and then he put 4 needles in my hand.

Huh???

I have pain on the left side of my upper pelvis and I got 4 needles in my right hand. He explained why and how, something about blockages and pathways, an explanation that really didn't leave me feeling like I got it still but after about 20 minutes with the needles in my hand, he had me stand up and move the ways that made that spot hurt and shocker, no pain whatsoever. None, nada, zip, zilch.

Trippiest. Thing. Ever!!!

I am curious to see if that pain relief lasts for any length of time but I will definitely give the acupuncture a few more tries. Who knows, maybe bloodletting and cupping after that.

Anyone ever try acupuncture and if so, what did you think???

A Peaceful Start to Spring Break

2011-03-28T13:53:00.000-07:00

Today marks the beginning of week two of Spring Break. With the exception of the kids driving me batty last Monday, the rest of last week was blissful. How you might ask? Did I take them out for educationally stimulating activities, did we do crafts together, was I ever calm and loving making it so they were saints all week? Since this is real life and not a Disney movie, we did none of that. Instead, they left Tuesday morning with Grandpa and spent the rest of the week in Utah. Hence the blissful week here at home. Kevin and me in a child-free zone for almost a week. Heaven.

While they were gone I was able to eat my breakfast and watch my 10 minutes of the morning news without first having to ~~beg~~ negotiate my right to even requisition the t.v. at all. Adding to the bliss, I was able to actually hear the news program, not just see the pictures with the volume cranked to an ungodly level. Since there were no fighter planes flying around my head, no one playing with the dog or talking to me about why the moon has a dark side, I could actually hear Matt Lauer. Turns out the man has a quite nice speaking voice.

picture from here

One day of my child-free time, I went to lunch and shopping with my mother and I couldn't help noticing what a different shopping companion she is instead of two boys. Not once did she stomp her foot and make a face when I said I wanted to look in yet another store. Not once did I have to use the Italian sodas at the Nordstrom Cafe as a bribe to make her stop whining. When I tried things on and asked her how they looked, she never once said, "weird". And, shocker of all shockers, she actually encouraged me to try things on. Gasp!!!

Drew and Ethan returned back home Saturday night and both had a wonderful time with Grandpa. Kevin and I enjoyed our quiet week but were happy to see the crazies back in the house.

Now, just one more week to go................

Let's Kick Off Spring Break!!

2011-03-18T09:28:00.000-07:00

Today begins my kids two week spring break and personally I am excited to have a break from the morning rush out the door and homework. Of course, I say that now but by about Monday afternoon, I am sure I will be whining about the mess Drew makes everywhere and how they fight and how much they talk constantly. But for now, happy about it.

While I was lunging and pressing and doing rollups this morning, I was thinking about what is in store for the weekend.

Today, my parents return from Hawaii so a fresh pineapple and macadamia nuts are coming our way and their dog, who we have been dog sitting AND who peed all over my living room sofa this week, is going home.

I started making croissants this morning and I am looking forward to having a croissant for breakfast on Sunday (they take 3 days to make). Kevin has been requesting lemon bars for weeks now and even though I am hard pressed to make something that doesn't involve chocolate, I am going to make him some lemon lime bars from this cookbook.

If you like to bake at all, I highly recommend this cookbook. Their recipe for brownies is absolutely the best ever and trust me, I have road tested about a gazillion, yes, that is right, a gazillion brownie recipes. I also love their monster cookie recipe, the brewer's malt blondies, the lemon drop cake and more.

We are planning on hitting Marco's, my favorite coal fired pizza joint this weekend and I am also looking forward to spending as much time as possible this weekend snuggled up with my husband forgetting about my peed on couch and upcoming IEP testing.

Now Where Did I Put That Easy Button?

2011-03-17T15:38:00.000-07:00

*This is long, I know and a bit of a rant so if you read the whole thing, you should win a prize but I needed to just vent for a moment*

Last night was Parent/Teacher conferences at my kid's school. I had my 3rd grader's first and was told that he is testing at an almost 6th grade level for reading and mid way through 4th grade for math. The teacher raved about how smart he is and how he is ahead of the game. Easy peasy conference with that teacher and I walked out feeling great.

Next, I met with Drew's significant special needs (SSN) teacher who showed me the sight words and letter sounds he is working on learning and the basic addition he is working on. She told me how hard he is working and what a great year he is having, which made me so happy to hear. His progress is slow but he keeps moving forward which is just great. Still feelin' good at this point.

Then, she brought up his next IEP meeting which will be the beginning of May (for those of you not in the know, the IEP is basically his learning plan for the next year. I meet with literally a team of people from the school and we hammer out what they are going to focus on in the coming year, it goes in the plan which then becomes the school's legal obligation for my son.) Every 3 years, the schools are supposed to re-test any student on an IEP to see if they continue to qualify for services and this year is our 3 year evaluation. Drew's teacher told me the paper for me to approve testing was coming home soon and said she had been asked to talk to me about us doing the I.Q. testing this go around.

A little back history here, the last time his 3 year was up, I agreed to all testing but indicated I had some reservations about the I.Q. testing portion and how it might be conducted. I spoke at length with the psychologist who would do the testing him letting him know what concerns I had and he in turn told me how he was going to make sure that all those concerns were addressed and that the testing was done in a meaningful way. Flash forward to a few days before the IEP meeting when I got the testing results and found out that of the 15 subsections in the standardized IQ test used by the district, the psychologist only tested my son on 3. 3, out of 15! 20% of the test! And, to make matters worse, the testing on 2 of the sections was done at lunchtime on field day. Not a day I would think would set a child up for optimum performance.

I showed up at the IEP meeting asking to have the testing thrown out and fully expected that to be a slam dunk. How can you give a child an IQ number and a disability label based on only 20% of the IQ test???? Doesn't even make sense. Instead of the slam dunk, I spent the following 3 months fighting with the district. It took countless letters, a few heated phone discussions, the district doing nothing for a good month I think in hopes that I would give up and finally me threatening to file for due process before we FINALLY got that sham of a test thrown out of his IEP.

So, back to yesterday, Drew's SSN teacher informs me that she is getting heat from the district that if I don't agree to the testing, they might be "forced" to take away Drew's services. In a way, I would like to see them try that. Plunk my 11 year old down in the regular-ed 5th grade classroom, with no support and see how that goes. My 11 year old who is only a very beginning reader, who is still working hard at getting simple addition down, and who needs a model to do any handwriting.

I walked out of the building, with all those previous good feelings gone and instead feeling like there may be yet another fight in my future. I just felt frustrated with the constant battle involved in making sure my child gets the education that federal law says he is entitled to. Why can't the school just do what they are supposed to do?? Why can't they care enough about my child to make sure the testing they put in his permanent file is actually complete, not to mention accurate. Why does this have to be such a battle? (Just to let you non-special needs parents in on a secret here, just because federal law says schools are supposed to do certain things, doesn't mean that they automatically do those things. In my experience, they often need repeated reminders about what those laws say).

I am wishing there was an Easy Button but fortunately, I come from a long line of stubborn Icelandic people and I can dig in when need be. Plus, truth be told, I will go through the fighting with the district, the I-am-stressed-out, over eating of brownies, the laying awake at night fantasizing about punching out the district head of special ed (this stuff brings out the 12 year old in me), the hours spent on Wrightslaw's website, and more to get my boy what he is entitled to and what is best for him. Maybe it isn't easy but it is so worth the effort.

If This Were A Jeopardy Category, It Would be Called Potpourri

2011-03-14T11:28:00.000-07:00

I felt like posting something today but I don't have anything sort of cohesive to talk about so you are getting a mishmash of thoughts, hence the potpourri reference (plus, the word potpourri just makes me laugh, there is something innately cheesy about that word, isn't there?).

Spring!!!!!

I am seeing evidence of spring around here lately. It is supposed to be in the upper 60's and low 70's here this week, bulbs are peeking up in the yard, birds have been around lately and Ella managed to scare up a wasp at the dog park last week, which of course she tried to eat and which of course stung her. The sun beating down on me like so,

This photo was taken by my talented friend Holly last summer, can you see all the gals in my sunglasses? Oh, and please excuse my fuzzy hair, rolled out of bed to go hiking.

seems just around the bend. Warm weather, rattlesnake season, short sleeves, flip flops and hiking in the mountains with Kevin and the boys is not too far off!

French Press

from here

For Christmas this year, Kevin got me a French press and a coffee grinder. I was raised Mormon (no longer practice) so I never even had coffee until my 20's and never made coffee myself until I got this French press. Prior to getting this, I drank coffee maybe once or twice a week and now with the in-house coffee apparatus, it is becoming a daily habit. I love how rich the coffee tastes from the French press. When I first got it, I googled how to make coffee in a French press and you wouldn't believe how what seems a simple process can be subject to various rules, many different techniques and heated debate - do you let sit for 4 minutes or 5???

Satan's Handiwork Perhaps?

A few weeks ago while shopping at Target, Kevin picked up these

We have a local sandwich shop that makes their own salt and pepper potato chips. You might think pepper on chips???? Crazy! Before trying one of the free samples at the sandwich place, I would have thought the same but the pepper is amazing, especially with a sandwich. So a few weeks ago, Kevin picked these out to try and they are insanely good. Kind of a kettle style chip (they come in a baked variety too) with the salt and pepper. So good but so bad. If I post in a few months about my thighs rubbing together, well, chances are the chip had something to do with it.

A New Addition to the Family

Just last week, Kevin and I completed our adoption paperwork. Soon there will be a home visit and a phone interview and then shortly after that, we will have ourselves another one of these

When we picked up Ella, her foster mom had just rescued these puppies from a breeder who, unable to sell them, was going to just shoot them rather than spend the money feeding them. How could you shoot that??????

A Word About the R-Word

2011-03-09T08:10:00.000-08:00

Recently, one of my friends, Holly, who also has a special needs child, participated in her hometown in a walk to end the R-word and reading about that experience on her blog has gotten me thinking about that darn R word. For those of you who don't know what R word I mean, I am talking about the word "retard" or "retarded" or "tard". A word that is thrown around in conversation on a regular, and in my opinion, too frequent basis.

While the term mental retardation is technically a medical term, the word "retard" has now become a word used to make fun of or put down someone or something. A few years back, I read a book on the history of mental retardation in America (not fun reading for a mother of a developmentally disabled child) and was surprised to find that the first clinical term for a person with a low i.q. was "moron", but then that word found itself becoming a euphemism for a negative and it was replaced by the term "idiot", which soon suffered the same fate and was then replaced with "mental retardation".

Now, once again, the clinical term for a person with low i.q. has become part of the normal lexicon as a way to make fun or to mock. Needless to say, "mental retardation" is now being thrown out in the special needs community and replaced with "intellectual disability" or "developmentally disabled" and who knows how long those terms will stay used only in the clinical sense.

As the mother of a child with developmental disabilities, I cannot tell you how much it offends me to hear that word tossed around. No matter how it is being used, it is hard for me to not see it as making a mockery of my child and his struggles.

When I hear someone say that word, I want to bring them home with me and have them watch Drew as he works so, so hard to learn to read, have them see the team of people that are needed to help him move forward with things, things that the person tossing around that darn R word probably learned without too much effort. I want them to see how sad he is that he doesn't have a friend to invite over for a sleepover or see him look at me with his gorgeous blue eyes and ask me what "freak" means. I want to show them how he is world's greatest hugger and how when he was younger, he could take his giant bin full of GeoTrax and build a track that used all the pieces and connected in every spot. I want them to know that he has spent the better part of his life in speech therapy, occupational therapy, physical therapy, feeding therapy having to do things that are really hard for him and working his butt off.

I want that R word user to see all of that, to see all this beautiful boy....................

..........and then try and call him a "retard" and see if it is still funny. See if his struggle and this thing that he didn't ask for is something still to be mocked.

Before having Drew, I myself was a user of the "retard" term and I get that people don't really think about it so what I am asking is that the next time you find yourself wanting to use that word, stop for a moment and think about my son and then see if it is a word you still want to use.

A Shot in the Spine

2011-03-03T07:12:00.000-08:00

from We Heart It

For today's entertainment, I am off to get another injection in my spine. You'd think I could come up with better things to do with my time, and believe me I could, but that darn disc of mine likes to make itself a priority. I last had an injection about 3 months ago and afterward, I felt the best I have in like a year and a half. I almost felt like my old self again.

It. Was. Great.

But then, back came some pain and my personal favorite disc side effect, the pins and needles down my leg. So back I go for another round.

Today, I am telling Dr. B. to just do the exact same thing he did last time only this time make it last forever. No pressure though.

Fortunately, the shot itself isn't painful and really the most painful part is having to arrive at the surgical center 90 minutes early where I will be forced to thumb through 6 month old issues of Time and Golf Digest while listening to music that could be categorized as "easy listening". Blech!

Tone Those Guns for Summer

2011-03-01T09:17:00.000-08:00

My cousin Heidi left me a comment that she had tried the Bulgarian split squats and was looking for another new exercise to try. I have several exercises from my trainer that I am really loving like prone jackknifes on a swiss ball, hamstring roll up on the swiss ball, this oblique thing that I have no name for and more.

Since summer is coming (yippee) I thought I would go with the Skull Crushers which have really toned up my arms. Prior to seeing the trainer, I always did kickbacks for my triceps and they were sufficient at keeping my triceps area from flapping in the breeze, you ladies know what I am talking about, but this exercise really works those triceps out and gives some quickly noticeable, rock hard results.

Here's how it works, lay down (can I just say, I am in favor of any exercise that lets me lay down while I do it) and hold a free weight in each hand. Choose a weight that is heavy enough that the last few reps of each set are going to be hard - but whatever you do, when you get fatigued, don't drop that weight. The exercise is called Skull Crushers for a reason. Bend your arms at the elbow keeping the upper part of your arm stable and keeping your elbows in the same position, don't let them sway out, and bring weights down next to your forehead. Then return to the starting position fully extending your arms at the top of the movement and squeezing your triceps.

I usually do 4 sets of 15 and you will really feel it the next day and like I said, just don't drop that weight on your head. Believe me when you are on the last few reps of the last set and your arms are shaking, you will see how bashing in your skull is a possibility.

Some Memories and 56 Flights of Stairs

2011-02-28T09:24:00.000-08:00

Me holding Tiff with April looking on

Yesterday marked the 23rd anniversary of my sister April's death. Typically, I write some memory about her here on this day but this year, I can't think of what to add to what has previously been written. So if you want to share in some April memories with me, look here and here. I still miss her and think about her a lot.

Yesterday, Kevin and I participated in the Anthem Fight for Air Climb, an event that benefits the American Lung Association. Kevin and his friend from work, Mary Jo, do this event annually, and this year was the first year I participated. The event is a stair climb up 56 flights of stairs to the top of the tallest building in Denver and it occurred to me while climbing the stairs that it was somewhat fitting to be doing an event benefiting the Lung Association on the day that the cancer in my sister's lungs took her life.

Here we are getting ready to race.

The guys hanging with a woolly mammoth (why there was a woolly mammoth mascot for the Lung Association completely mystifies me).

This was the first race type thing I have done since hurting my back and it was a lot of fun to get back out there and to do this with Kevin. Although, after running marathons and half marathons, it was kind of odd to do a race that is over in like 15 minutes. Quite a big difference from an endurance event where you have to ignore a brain screaming at you to please end the agony and stop running. I was pleased to see that my lunging and walking or elliptical workouts have paid off and I made it to the top with no thigh burn and no real huffing.

Maybe We Should Change His Name to Pig Pen

2011-02-25T07:17:00.000-08:00

Earlier this week, Drew and I were looking for one of his hoodies. We looked every place we could think of and couldn't find it. So, yesterday, we renewed our search and went to look under his bed. This is what I pulled out from under his bed........................and then my head exploded.

Okay not really, but I swear this kid's sloppiness is going to do me in one day! He never wants to throw anything away. If I find trash in his room, I have to hide it in the garbage because if he sees it, he will pull it back out. Yesterday's excavation turned up plenty of ripped cardboard, cuz you never know when you might need that, a Dusseldorf city guide, which he insists he "needs" despite telling me repeatedly how boring Dusseldorf was, many Star Wars books and Nerf bullets, a few cd's, a bag packed with books he insisted needed to stay in his room and more. Even Ella seemed intrigued by the pile of crap that came out from under that bed.

How this happened is beyond me. His dad and I are neat people yet we have this 11 year old who's life goal appears to be hoarding things and spreading junk far and wide. His room pretty much always gives me anxiety and his version of a clean room and my version are about as far apart as Roseanne Barr and Giselle Bundchen.

Get Me Off This Thing!

2011-02-22T13:13:00.000-08:00

from We Heart It

When I was a kid, my family used to leave our Chicago home and make an annual trip to Winter Park Colorado for some skiing. Up on the mountain, my younger sister, Tiffany, and I loved to go off the groomed runs and ski the trails in the trees. Instead of smooth and wide, they were narrow, twisty, and bumpy, with large pine and aspen obstacles, and the occasional 4 foot drop at the end (totally had my knees in my ribcage on that one BUT stuck the landing).

As I got older and taller, my skies got longer (this was before the whole parabolic thing) and as they got longer making tight turns in the trees became a bit trickier and brought a whole new element of thrill to the entire outing.

On one particular day, we were schussing through the trees and all of the sudden, tight turn out of nowhere. Well, me and my jumbo skies did not make the turn and I ended up off the trail, stopped by a pine tree. Luckily, I was not going too fast, so no physical damage but I did end up with one ski on either side of the pine tree and my body pressed up against the tree. Tiff and I had a good laugh, in fact, I seem to remember one of us making some yellow snow (the one who's name rhymes with Biff) and then after quelling the giggles, I moved to extract myself. I pushed back against the tree with both arms but my arms were not long enough to get the tips of my skies past the tree trunk and when I let go of the tree, I slid right back into place, up against that trunk. A few more attempts yielded the same frustrating result. Back up against that tree. Finally, admitting defeat, I snapped myself out of my skies and resorted to removing my skies with my hands.

The past few months of my life have seen me struggling with some things. I am trying to work through some feelings I have and I am trying to change the things I need to so that I can move ahead. But despite the best intentions, I feel like I am back up against that darn tree. I push away, feel like I am making progress and then, bam, hello tree again. Only this time, no easy fix by removing my skies, instead I have to just keep pushing and hope that eventually, I see my way out of this bunch of trees and back on the trail once again.

Random Stuff

2011-02-18T13:21:00.000-08:00

Okay, yes, again I have changed up the blog background. I found the black to just be too heavy and this isn't THAT kind of blog.

Once again, the kids are off school today. I think it has been about 6 weeks (okay, not think because I am keeping track and I am beginning to get bitter) since the kids have had a full, 5 day week of school. There have been 3 snow days, two of which were merely because it was cold and had the Chicagoan in me accusing our school district and it's inhabitants of being complete wusses, MLK Day, 2 teacher work days, and 2 days of Ethan home with Type B influenza. Today, another teacher workday and Ethan, in some effort to infect the entire family with something once and for all, is again sick, this time with strep throat.

Nothing at all noteworthy or exciting going on today, hence the time to mess around with blog formats.
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On a side note, this week in my workouts I tried something new, Bulgarian split squats and I kind of like them. Well, okay, I suppose I like them in the same way I like it when my husband rubs out a knot in my back. Hurts like hell in the process but feels good afterward.

I saw this exercise in a workout book and the author of the book said it was one of the most hated moves in her gym but one which gets great results. Just having the word "Bulgarian" in the name, to me, suggests something less than easy. So, if basic lunging gets boring or it seems like you have to do a million lunges to get any muscle fatigue, try these and you will definitely feel something.

Here you go:

photo from Laura Kowaleski

Our sun worshipper

2011-02-17T09:12:00.000-08:00

We have had Ella about a year and a half now and one thing we have learned about Vizsla's in that time is that they love to bake in the sun. Probably something to do with that thin coat and being cold easily. This morning I found her wedged into a patch of sun on the stairs.

The other thing with the thin coat/getting cold easily stuff is that in winter, during the night she often gets cold. Our first winter with her, she would wake up during the night, crying and sometimes suggestively nosing the edge of our down comforter. Realizing she was cold, we got her a doggy heating pad for her dog bed.

Still waking up in the night crying.

Then we bought a blanket and put her to bed every night with her doggy heating pad AND a blanket covering her.

Still waking up crying.

I was complaining to my mother about the having to get up in the night and cover our crying baby with a blanket and she, being a seamstress extraordinaire, came over with a tape measure and whipped up this little number for Ella to sleep in.

Does the trick on the cold nights and provides entertainment for Kevin and me because she looks completely dorky in it. Like the other dogs at the dog park would beat her up if they saw her in it. I think it looks a bit like a Snuggie and that thought had me briefly, and I mean briefly, considering setting her up with her bed jacket on, a bowl of popcorn and a remote on the couch and using that photo for this post but then the logistics of keeping her face out of the popcorn long enough to take a picture stopped me.

Playdate for Ella

2011-02-14T08:55:00.000-08:00

Since Polka Dot died last month, Ella has been missing having other dogs around. My friend Kelly and I have been trying to meet up weekly at our local dog park so Ella can play with her dog friends Lily and Bandit.

Ella pretty much runs full speed the entire hour we are at the dog park. If she can find a dog to chase her, she is in heaven but if not, she will still run her guts out regardless.

Bandit was trying to get Lily, who had snow stuck in her pads, up and moving with some backup from Ella. As usual, Ella is approaching the problem with maybe a tad more gusto than it actually requires.

A brief pause from running and attempting to kiss all the humans to pose for me.

After a trip to the dog park, Ella pretty much spends the rest of the day like this. She has two speeds, full blast and asleep, and not much else in between.

More to Working Out Than Just Running

2011-02-01T10:07:00.000-08:00

Photo from: We heart it

About 7 years ago, I took up running. I had always thought it would be cool if I could run a marathon (and let's be honest here, I also thought if I were a runner, rock hard thighs and the ability to eat like a lumberjack would finally be mine). After some encouragement from my marathon running cousin, I picked out a race and started running. Five years, two full marathons, and countless half marathons later, I was definitely hooked on being a runner.

But, my body (traitor!) had other ideas. About a year and a half ago, I injured my back. Herniated a disc, to be exact, while training for my third full marathon. I managed to still run the half marathon out of shear stubbornness (can you say painful?) but that was literally, the last time I ran. I then spent the next year doing PT, getting injections in my lumbar spine, considering fusion surgery, trying a chiropractor, taking narcotics when needed, crying a lot, and feeling frustrated with walking as my only form of exercise.

Over time, it became clear that returning to running wouldn't really be a good idea and so I continued walking at least 2 miles a day and sometimes riding the stationary bike or using the elliptical at the gym all the while moaning to Kevin, my husband, about my inability to really work my body out.

This fall, Kevin suggested I hire myself a personal trainer and have her tailor a workout plan for me that would work my body out but do it in a way that wouldn't cause injury to my fragile back. I have to say, I was nervous about the whole thing because after a year of horrendous pain, it is safe to say I am a scaredy cat.

After some steady encouragement and pep talking from Kevin and putting my fears aside, I contacted Kate at Xceed Fitness and explained my situation. She said I would be a challenge but that she thought she could work up a program for me. I nervously went for my first session where she worked my butt off for an hour. I walked out with shaking arms and legs and a smile on my face. I worked with her for a month and since then have been doing the exercises on my own.

Most of the exercises use your own body weight, free weights, and bands and sometimes machines like the leg press. I am doing things like skull crushers, pushups, lunges, planks, rollups on the ball, flys, and much more. I have always worried a bit about weight training, that I would end up looking like this:

Photo from: We heart it

Soooooooooo not the look I am going for. To my surprise though, after 2 months of working out this way, I have more muscle definition (the good kind, not like above) and feel more solid than I ever did when I was simply running. (Don't quite look like the chick at the beginning of my post yet though - something to work toward maybe?) My thighs even are more firm and muscle defined than they have ever been and my husband keeps teasingly calling me muscles, which I love.

On a fitness blog I read, the author tries out different exercise routines for several months and then blogs about the results. Recently, she followed a plan by Rachel Cosgrove that has you doing no cardio at all and only 3 hours a week of weight lifting exercises. The author and her workout buddies were really nervous about abandoning their cardio but to their surprise, all of them lost inches and clothing sizes without doing any cardio. You can read about it here.

So, in spite of my previous feeling that running was the best workout around, I am newly convinced that if you want to look lean and tight, weights and weight bearing exercises get the job done.

Getting Caught Up

2011-01-28T13:46:00.000-08:00

Remember how I promised to get my blogging butt in gear and get some pictures from Drew's birthday and Christmas up? Uh, yeah, then the dog died and I got sidetracked, yet again. So, now, finally here are some pics from our December activities and then I will be good and caught up and ready to post ahead with more current things.

In early December, we celebrated Drew's 11th birthday. I really can't believe that he is a "tween" (frightening) and only one year away from junior high. It doesn't seem all that long ago that he was a tiny 5 pound guy. He is doing so well this year in school and is also maturing some (now if I can just get him to care about his room looking like an ad for the Hoarders show). For his birthday, he had a small party with some boys from his significant special needs program at school and we took him out to dinner with Grandma and Grandpa Harmer and Aunt Tiff, who was in town. He also got a fortune in gift cards from the grandparents, Aunt Leslie and family and Auntee T and Uncle Peter. He went shopping with all his cards and came home saying, "I am just a happy boy!"

For Christmas this year, we celebrated at home with my parents. My mom and I made an excellent dinner (if I do say so myself) of prime rib, rolls, scalloped potatoes and a raspberry trifle. Christmas day was spent opening gifts and then playing with all the new stuff. Drew and Ethan both got PaperJamz guitars from Santa and I think those were one of the favorites for both of them. Kevin and I got a kick out of watching all the posing and face making that went along with the guitar playing. I think there is a little frustrated rock star in both of them.

A Hard Goodbye

2011-01-05T12:30:00.000-08:00

Polka Dot Covington

Feb 1998 - January 4th, 2011

I can still see her, like it was yesterday in her cage at the Downers Grove Animal Shelter back in March of 1999. She was in one of the first cages in the row and all the dogs were barking like it was a contest, but not her. She was sitting there at the front of the cage, smiling, looking gangly and slightly dorky, and quietly watching all the people mill about. Abused, practically starved to death, deaf and with a tail pee yellow from sitting in her own urine. Not exactly what you would think would grab a dog shoppers attention but there was something about her we couldn't quite resist and so she became ours.

(Here is exactly that dorky, smiley look that first greeted us. This is only maybe a month or two after getting her.)

In the 12 years that we have owned her, she brought so much love to our family. She never, ever wanted to get into trouble and always did what she was asked. Because she was deaf, we used hand signals to train her and she learned them just as quickly as a hearing dog learns verbal commands. In fact, she got so good at just simply reading body language that a lot of times, I wouldn't even have to give her a signal. I used to marvel at how when I would be getting ready to go out somewhere and had decided to take her along, she always knew even before I gave her the go in the car signal. I used to wonder if I emitted some, you are going in the car smell, or something.

(Just a year and a half ago racing around the yard with Ella)

Polka loved to be petted and to be close. She followed me everywhere around the house. If I was doing laundry, she was right behind me, if I was in the bathroom, she would wait outside the door, and I was always tripping over her in the kitchen. I referred to her as my trusty sidekick and it is definitely going to take some time to adjust to not having a dog right there that I am tripping over. She also loved to race full speed around the yard, to go in the car, to have treats, to go hiking in the mountains and just to sit by someone and be petted.

(Filthy dirty and totally in her element here at my parent's cabin in Utah. That was one of her favorite places to be and I love this picture because that is just pure, unadulterated joy on her face.)

I have so many wonderful memories and goofy memories of her. I remember once we took her to Chatfield dog park. They have a bunch of trails and ponds for the dogs. We were walking past a pond and she saw another dog running into the water to fetch a ball. Since she was always a bit competitive about toys, at the next throw, she took off into the water after that dog's ball. She had never been in the water before and when she got out past where her feet could touch, she panicked. Instead of doing some instinctual dog paddle, she instead started flailing wildly around with her front legs out straight, like scissor kicks, water splashing everywhere. We were on the bank laughing hysterically but also wondering if we were going to have to get in there and rescue her.

(She always looked so cute sleeping. I also love this picture because you can see the super soft, loose skin under her jaw that I loved to pet so much.)

She was so devoted to our family and to me. I remember once a few years ago, I was really upset about something. I went upstairs to the master bathroom to cry where the kids couldn't see me. She followed as usual. Typically, when I am in the bathroom she sits outside the door and waits. On this day, I went in sobbing my guts out, which she couldn't hear being deaf, and shut the door. A minute later she scratched at the door. I ignored that but then again, another scratch this time followed by a bark. I opened the door and she came in, sat down next to me and leaned all of her body weight into me as if to say, "I know something is wrong and I am here".

(On a hike in the mountains with the family trotting down the trail.)

Although it has just been a day, I miss her so much already and am so heartbroken to know that I will never see her again or pet her soft ears but I know at almost 13 years old, it was her time. I will miss the white hair on everything, her impatient bark at the back door when she wanted to be let in, the distinctive click of her nails on our hardwood floor, her cramming herself against me when I get on the floor to do any workout thing, her bouncy way of running, her slow lick, and countless other things. I still can't believe that yesterday morning she was here. It doesn't seem like enough time but I suspect it would never feel like enough.

(Watching the boys ride their bikes.)

I will always love you Miss Polka Toes and forever be glad we brought home that skinny, pee-stained love of a dog. Goodbye fuzzy one.

(Wrestling with Ella in the yard and looking much tougher than she actually was.)

Coming Soon!

2010-12-29T07:37:00.000-08:00

I know, I stink at blogging lately. There are so many things I need to get on here like Drew's 11th birthday, Christmas, some zany Vizsla tales and one Vizsla birthday. I have thought about it but then when it came time to actually sit down and post, well, other things have gotten in the way. I have been a little preoccupied with my actual life and that big time suck also known as Christmas.

So, in the coming days there will be at least one post about something listed above. Promise.

The Pursuit of Happiness

2010-11-11T13:45:00.000-08:00

Happiness flowchart

If only it were that simple. Although, maybe it is and we humans over complicate the entire process.

Yesterday, I listened to a podcast of a conversation between the Dalai Lama and three other religious scholars talking about happiness and what you can learn about happiness through suffering. Something that has been on my mind as of late. The whole conversation was really interesting and I highly recommend listening but a few things really stood out to me.

Rabbi Sacks, one of the panelists, was asked his opinion about whether happiness is something we can pursue. He related a little story which effectively said that by pursuing or chasing after happiness, we are assuming it is out in front of us when maybe what we need to do is stop and let it catch up to us or recognize that it is already around us.

The other thing I liked from this discussion was that when asked how he stays happy during suffering, the Dalai Lama said that he believes every tragedy has some positive thing in it even if it is only that it brings new and different opportunities.

The whole discussion gave me some things to chew on as I am in the midst of trying to sort some things out in my life and to figure out how to be happy within myself.

I May Never Graduate from Parenting 101

2010-10-07T07:29:00.000-07:00

A few nights ago I was thinking about how Drew is going to turn 11 in December. I cannot believe I have been at this parenting gig for 11 years! As a parent, the days can seem never ending but somehow the years fly by. How that works I don't know.

Even though 11 years seems like a considerable amount of time I am constantly amazed at how much I still have to learn and how many things I haven't quite nailed down yet. If I had to grade myself, I would say there are several areas that would be marked "needs improvement" but I have managed to learn a few things along the way and here are some of the highlights:

- Check little boy pockets before throwing things in the wash. I should know better on this one but still manage to fall prey to it quite regularly. I have washed countless tissues, wrappers, papers, sticks, rocks, toys, markers, crayons, and recently one iPod shuffle that is now sparkly clean but can only be used as a fetching belt accessory. Should've checked the pockets.

- When a small child is having a meltdown, the adult yelling, slamming something or doing anything that constitutes 12 year old behavior, never helps dial down the situation.

- If you hear strange sounds and ask, "what are you doing?" and the question is followed with a, "nothing", investigate immediately. "Nothing" is almost always something like a hogtied dog or the excavation of a putting green in the backyard. Both of those things have actually happened in our house.

- When walking into the mall with two small males, always exaggerate the number of stores that need to be visited so that they will either think you are a rock star when you are done early or not harangue you when you want to pop into a store without it being on the itinerary.

- Never, and I repeat, never commit to anything without leaving yourself an out. Do not agree to go to Chuck E. Cheese without throwing an exit clause into the contract. Something like, "we can go to Chuck E. Cheese if I get x, y, or z done AND if I am sure going will not cause me to have an aneurysm." Something along those lines.

There you have it. About all of the wisdom I have gleaned in these almost 11 years. The rest I am still trying to figure out and this is certainly a job that is ever changing and that challenges on a regular basis but all of that is balanced by one really good hug or an "I love you" from those little people.

Whew!!!

2010-10-01T15:04:00.001-07:00

Do you ever have one of those days? One of those days where there is just a lot going on and you feel like you never get a second to process even one of those things going on? Well, that was yesterday for me. I was basically on the go from the minute I woke up. I had coffee for lunch, THAT busy!

In the midst of all of that, I got some new information yesterday about my crappy body and some decisions are going to have to be made. I was feeling a bit bereft about the situation and frustrated. Then the husband comes home with a bit of a dilemma which has no quick and easy answer. And to top things off we were up to our eyeballs in one special needs child having a meltdown over nerves about a field trip scheduled for the next day. You could just feel the crazy in the air. Kevin and I were trying to talk in code about all of this during dinner but gave up and later ended up in our bedroom plopped down across the bed talking about the various things going on.

Not long into our stolen quiet moment, two dogs wandered in and started wrestling, complete with growling sounds. A few minutes later I see a head peeking around the door and in comes Ethan, who jumps on the bed and snuggles up to us. And then Drew shows up with a construction book asking if he can have a real bulldozer for Christmas. (Soooooo not going to happen). For a moment I was disappointed that our little reverie was broken but then at the same time the growling, jumping dogs, the little boy pressed up against me and Kevin, and the boy dreaming about Christmas all felt so right and made me feel like everything else will get figured out in due time.

My Little Thinker

2010-09-24T08:47:00.000-07:00

About a week ago, I was standing in the kitchen cleaning up dinner dishes and Ethan came in and said to me out of nowhere, "there are just a lot of things I don't understand about the world." My first thought was, that makes two of us but then I asked him, "like what?"

He said, "how did the English language start and who made it up?" I smiled a bit at the question and at him puzzling over such a thing. I was like, "uuuuuuuhhhhhhh, no one made it up and it gradually came about."

Later that week he hit me with, "what is Asia like?" and "why do some people think money is so important?" Both good questions and honestly I was surprised about him picking up on money thing at such a young age.

He is such a thinker and has been challenging me with questions from an early age. A few years ago, he was the king of questions like, "what if the sun were the moon and the moon the sun?" or, and this one cracked me up, "if you dug a hole to China, you dig down so when you get there are you going to come up out of your hole or fall out of it?"

I love this about him; that he doesn't just take the world at face value but wonders about it all.

My Crisis Kit Essentials

2010-09-15T16:15:00.000-07:00

I love books and am an avid reader so naturally, when I have a problem or need information, I read a book that deals with my current question or issue. That is how over the years I have wound up reading some real page turners like a book about special education law (useful knowledge and can also double as a sleep aide), a book on the history of mental retardation in America (not happy reading for a mother of a developmentally disabled child - I still have nightmares about that book), and more recently books on back issues. Riveting stuff I know.

Just recently I picked up a book about persistent pain called "The Pain Chronicles". Let's face it, I would much rather be reading something like "What to Do When You Win the Mega-zillionaire Jackpot", but unfortunately, pain chronicles is where I find myself right now.

Reading the book has made me think a lot about how I deal with the pain issues I have had the last year and the things that I tell myself about it all. Some methods I have are pretty decent and healthy and some are a bit self defeating. Among my two favorite and long time coping strategies are music and chocolate.

I love music almost as much as I love books. My kids can attest to the fact that there is often music playing in our house or even better, I am frequently found walking around the house with my ipod on, ear buds in and sometimes singing at the top of my lungs (mostly just to make my audience of two laugh). What I listen to often depends on my mood. My go-to I am sad music would be anything from REM's Automatic For the People or from The National's latest album, which is so melancholy that it would turn the happiest person somber after one chorus. If you hear me listening to Tool or Perfect Circle, know that I am probably pissed about something or at someone and it would be best to back away and not make eye contact. If I am happy, well, anything goes but right now Arcade Fire's, The Suburbs does the job. All of it evokes some emotion in me and can definitely help me cope with whatever is going on in my life.

My other trying to cope friend is chocolate. Preferably dark chocolate in some sort of baked form like a brownie, molton chocolate babycake, or my new love, the brewer's malt blondie. If I am stressed about something, you can be sure there will be a dessert in my near future. Not the healthiest strategy but I figure it beats hard drinking and street drugs.

Yes, I also have more meaningful ways to cope like talking to my husband, a man who deserves some sort of medal for patiently listening to all the complaining over the past year, or my parents but the music and the chocolate, while a bit superficial, are always available in a pinch and I think will always be a part of my coping toolbox.

Wow, 9 Years Old!!

2010-09-13T09:13:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Ethan's 9th birthday. I cannot believe my baby is 9 years old! It doesn't seem that long ago that I was sitting in the hospital waiting for him to come. That day was such an odd mix of emotions. The whole 9/11 thing had happened the day before and I just felt sad and upset about that but then I was excited to meet this new person coming to our family.

In honor of Ethan's birthday, here is a short list of some of the things I absolutely adore about him.

* I love that he is a total foodie and has been from birth. Literally minutes out of the womb, that kid wanted to eat. When he was a toddler if you were eating anything near him, he would come over, pudgy hand outstretched and say, "some, some" over and over until you fed him. His nickname is Munchee because he is such a food man.

* I love his zany sense of humor and how he sees humor in the world around him. I also love that if you get him laughing, his laugh turns into this cackle that is just hilarious to listen to.

* I love how even now at 9 years old when he is asleep he makes this sound with his mouth that he has made since he was a baby.

* I love his very strict sense of right and wrong. He is a rule follower and is incensed when someone else doesn't follow the rules.

* I love how compassionate he is toward other people. Every teacher or leader he has ever had has commented on how he is always concerned if anyone in the group is upset and how he tries to make it better.

* I love how he treats his brother. Having an older brother who needs you to read things for him or who asks for your help all the time has to be annoying but Ethan is always so sweet about helping Drew with things.

* I love his spirit of adventure. He loves to do and see new things. When we hike, he explores every nook, cranny and boulder that we pass. After travelling this summer, he is already asking where we are going next.

Happy 9th birthday Ethan! I love you so much and am so proud to be your mother.

World's Slobbiest Vizsla

2010-09-02T06:37:00.000-07:00

We recently bought some new dog food that has pieces of shredded chicken mixed in with the kibble. Ella has decided that those chicken bits are the best thing ever. Her new method of eating is to take a mouthful of food from the bowl, spit the entire mouthful out onto the floor and eat out the only the chicken bits.

One of my personal favorite techniques is when she decides to eat while we are eating. Her food is in the dining room and we are eating at the kitchen table. She will transport her mouthful of dog food to the kitchen, spit it on the floor and then eat her chicken bits. I am then left with bits of dog food strewn all about the house.

Uncool is the New Cool

2010-08-28T12:24:00.000-07:00

I knew this day would come, I just didn't know it would be so soon. About a week ago, Drew, my 5th grader, came downstairs dressed for school wearing a pirate kerchief from a birthday party around his neck. I looked at the ensemble and said, "maybe you shouldn't wear that because it looks a little strange."

Drew looked at me for a moment and said, "this is just cool. You wouldn't know that because YOU are not cool!"

And there you have it, alert the media, it is official, I am no longer cool. (Of course, it is questionable if I was ever cool).

I Feel the Kneed, the Kneed For........

2010-08-12T09:44:00.000-07:00

....did you think I was going to say "speed"?

Nah, I wish it was something that exciting.

Ready for it? More PT!!!!! Cause I love it so much and my life is not complete if I don't visit a PT office at least quarterly.

The ol' knees have been bugging me for the past 4 or 5 months. I was hoping the simple exercises I was given by the orthopedic Dr would work but alas, they are still bugging me. I kind of wonder if they were jealous of all the attention the back was getting and are now maliciously acting up? If so, STOP IT!!! Saw the doctor again last week who said I have some patellafemoral syndrome and quad tendinitis and suggested PT.

Amazingly, the dumb knees felt pretty decent hiking around Europe but have been killing me since getting home. Seems loading the dishwasher, cleaning house, and doing laundry are all more of a burden for the knees than walking/hiking. I told Kevin that all signs are pointing to me needing to go back to Switzerland indefinitely. For medical reasons of course. Has nothing, whatsoever, to do with the cheese and chocolate and bakeries. MEDICAL REASONS. He just laughed.

I am pretty darn frustrated with all of it because after a year of nursing my back, doing PT, the chiro, injections and anything else anyone could come up with, the back is finally feeling much better. Not totally pain free but much more functional and lots of chunks of time where it doesn't hurt at all. YAY!!! But then now the knees. Those bastards. (Sorry mom)

What I don't get is that a little over a year ago, my body felt invincible. Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound! Now, not so much. The other night when the knees were just throbbing I came up with what I thought was a brilliant solution. We could amputate both legs like at mid thigh, thereby ridding me of knee pain AND cellulite in one fell swoop. So genius right?! Kevin, the old spoilsport, thought maybe PT would be a better first step. (I told him he could call me stumpy but still it was a no go).

So back I go tomorrow. Crossing my fingers that this little issue doesn't take a whole year to heal like someone else I know (that's right, I am talking to you lumbar spine).

**btw, took like 40 pictures of my knees to go with this post and can I just say, knees, in isolation are ugly little buggers.**

The "well cooked" Vizsla connundrum

2010-08-11T06:34:00.000-07:00

Last year sometime, I wrote a blog post called, "I Like My Vizsla Well Cooked" (http://coloradocovingtons.blogspot.com/2009/07/i-like-my-vizsla-well-cooked.html). It had a picture of Ella splayed out on the deck baking in the sun. A common occurence around here during warmer weather.

Recently I have noticed an odd trend. At the bottom of the blog page I have a little Feedjit tracker thingy. It tells me where people are from who look at the blog and will also tell if they arrive at the main blog page or if they have come to a specific post. About two months ago, I noticed that there are a lot of people showing up in the traffic feed who are coming straight to the well cooked vizsla posting. Upon looking more, I noticed there is almost one every day and several throughout the week.

I was little perplexed about how these people were ending up on my blog so I went to Google and google searched various terms and, voila, after I searched "cooked vizsla", there was my blog post, number 3 in the list.

Which begs the question, are these people really wanting to cook a vizsla? Ewwwww. Aside from being wonderful dogs, they are also extremely active and I am quite sure would be gamey and tough. Please don't eat vizsla people! They are for snuggling with not eating!

Week 3: Italy and Austria

2010-08-02T07:11:00.000-07:00

After our wonderful week in Switzerland, we hit the bakery one last time and then drove south to Lake Como in Italy. To get to our rental, we had to drive some distance around the lake and let me say, my dad deserves a special award for piloting our rental van around the narrow, windy streets of Como's towns. Glad I didn't have to do it.

The boys in Menaggio. While we were in Italy, we ate some amazing pasta and gelato. The boys were both over the moon about the gelato and Drew just kept saying, "I just can't forget about that gelato!"

Kevin and the boys walking up the street in Bellagio, a town that is not for the weak in the knees.

Drew watching Bellagio disappear into the distance.

One day, we arrived back at our villa to discover we had locked ourselves out. My dad had left one of the 2nd floor terrace doors open so Kevin hoisted Ethan up onto the roof to break us in. Ethan was so thrilled that he was able to come to the rescue and was so thrilled to break us in. I probably should be worried about that.

After a few days in Como, we headed north to Pinswang, Austria (near Reutte and Fussen, Germany). We stayed in a wonderful hotel that felt more like staying with family friends. A very charming country hotel which had ponies and bunnies for the kids to feed and pet as well as a play area for the kids. One of the coolest things about the hotel was that it was located directly across from a hiking trail that takes you right to Neuschwanstein castle. The hike was so much fun and a much more charming way to approach the castle instead of pulling up in a tour bus with the other tourists. Here, the boys are climbing a hunting blind we passed on the hike to the castle.

The boys walking through the German forest.

On the trail is the old border station where you cross from Austria into Germany.

The next day, we went to the medieval Ehrenberg Castle in nearby Reutte Austria. The castle is from the 13th century and after a short hike up to the ruins, you are free to explore every nook and cranny on your own. The kids absolutely loved it!

Ethan exploring the castle.

Ethan and I pretending to fall off one of the castle walls. You can't tell from the picture but there was a pretty steep drop off behind us so I am clutching his arm during the pretending to ensure no real falling went on.

Ehrenberg castle had a wonderful museum full of all kinds of items relating to medieval life. It was a really nice museum for kids as they had plenty of interactive exhibits. Here is Drew trying on a knight's mask and glove.
Ethan testing out the chain mail, complete with sword. The sword was really heavy so I had to snap the picture fast. I think he makes a very handsome knight.
Drew finding gold in the old fort at Ehrenberg.

Week 2: Switzerland - Land of Cheese and Chocolate

2010-07-29T19:20:00.000-07:00

Did I mention the chocolate and the cheese? I have to just pause for a minute while I remember........okay, so after a week in Dusseldorf, we flew to Zurich where we met up with Kevin and my dad and drove on to Grindewald, nestled in the Swiss alps. We spent a lovely week there hiking, sampling a million different alpen cheeses, eating chocolate and visiting the bakery on a daily basis. So wonderful!

I loved this old church on the far end of town. I got plenty of chances to look at it too since it was positioned right across the street from what extensive research on my part revealed to be the best bakery in Grindewald.

The boys on what had to be the worst hike ever! I love this picture because it looks almost sinister. Like Drew is about to club an unsuspecting Ethan over the head on the mysterious moors or something of that sort. Really Drew was just waving at me.

Woke up to a cloud sitting on the mountains. We thought it would blow off or burn off but no, stayed all day. Basically we hiked 3 hours only able to see a few feet in front of us. Apparently there were some gorgeous views and even a lake. Hmph, wouldn't know it.

Kevin and the boys rolling around in the meadow.

One of about 500 attempts at a good family picture.

Me and Drew (and Peezy tucked in Drew's shirt) on the alpine slide. It was both boys first time and they both loved it although we couldn't convince Drew to go it alone.

Ethan was a pro at the alpine slide after his first trial run.

On one of the many train rides up the mountain, the conductor let Drew sit up in his cabin with him. Drew was in heaven!

Drew on his first gondola ride up the mountain. Not to sure about it but quickly got used to it.

Ethan and I up at Mannlichen where the views of the Eiger and Jungfrau were stunning.

Me on the trail near Kleine Scheidig. Kevin and I planned to hike across the ridge from where the train deposited us to the tram station at the other end of the trail and then ride the tram back down the mountain. The sign said 1 hour 40 minute hike but when we started we realized we had only 40 minutes until the last tram left to go down the mountain. So, this was the world's fastest hike and this the one and only picture we bothered to take. Arrived in a record 30 minutes. Made the tram and realized the times posted on the sign must assume that you crawl the trail or something. Little bit overstated on the times.

Have you ever seen anything more beautiful. I defy you to find anything ugly in the Swiss alps.

Kevin and I at First relaxing after dinner of brats and roschti, a local potato dish.

We had a wonderful time during our week in Switzerland and the boys both say that being there was their favorite part of the trip. I would happily go back anytime.

Week 1: Germany

2010-07-28T15:42:00.000-07:00

*Since there were 3 weeks to this trip and since blogspot is a pain in the you know what when it comes to uploading pictures, I am going to break my posts about our trip into parts to avoid the mind numbing boredom that sets in uploading picture after picture.*

Getting there

I was unsure how the boys would do with the 13 hours of flying and then the 8 hour time difference. Well, these two acted like seasoned world travelers. Both of them were really well behaved on the plane even though we arrived in Germany at what was for us, the middle of the night. When we arrived, it was around 8 am Germany time and Drew kept cracking me and my mom up by asking, "when are we having dinner?", "what day is it?". Over and over again. I was like, "let's go over this AGAIN, it is morning here, it is Saturday".

Once we got to the hotel, we unpacked and while doing this, Ethan fell asleep on us. Now, the best way to acclimatize to a different time zone is to sleep and eat at the times the local people sleep and eat. My mom and I woke him up to go into town and he was not happy. Once in the altstadt, I told him I was buying him a Coke and he was going to drink it all. Definitely a first.

Germany

Our 2nd day there, we took the train (illegally as it turns out - accidentally got on the ICE, which we did not have tickets for but got us stowaways to Cologne in record time) to Cologne to see the famous Dom there. One of the biggest Gothic cathedrals in the world. We climbed 510 steps to the top of one of the spires, which was really cool but given the 95 degree heat and humidity, also really hot. We also happened to be there the same day as the Gay Pride parade which brought out a colorful crowd and provided a whole different kind of education for the boys. I think I will be laughing for months over the look on Ethan's face after passing some men, in mini skirts and heels who, ehem, had some enhancements. One had his new Pam Anderson chest covered only with pasties.

Drew was so excited about riding the trains and subways. Excitement that dissipated after a whole week of subwaying everywhere.

The guys at Konigsalle in Dusseldorf. Basically a fancy shopping street but it did have a very pretty canal and bridges in the middle.

Both boys, but Drew in particular, loved watching the barges going up and down the Rhine river. Drew made both my mom and I take several pictures of the barges.

We went down to the river one night after dinner and the guys had fun throwing rocks in the river and watching the barge traffic.

Here are the guys at a park north of Dusseldorf. It was a really pretty park and had a fun children's play area. It was super hot out so both guys were beet red in the face and pretty droopy after playing there for awhile.

On our last day in Dusseldorf, we were sick of the big city and decided to rent a car to drive south to Burg Elz, the castle. It is an 800 year old castle that has amazingly been in the same family all that time. They still live in one part of the castle. Unfortunately, midway through our trip down there, Drew got horribly sick. Painful headache, vomiting, telling me he thought he was going to pass out and looking like he might make good on that statement.

I decided we would turn around and head back to the city. Yeah right. Every autobahn exit I passed had no way to get back on the freeway and armed only with directions to the castle and a crappy rental car map and not wanting to get us lost in middle Germany, we decided to drive the remaining 20 minutes to the castle, let Ethan look at it but not tour it and then go back. Also adding to the fun was the fact that it was 100 degrees out and about 85% humidity. The castle looked amazing but all in all, it was a stressful and rough day that had both kids crying at one point and a certain blond woman driving a minicar on the autobahn wanting to cry too.

Back to reality

2010-07-28T15:41:00.000-07:00

After 3 weeks of travel, we arrived back home on Saturday. The kids were happy to see their beds, their toys, our dogs and to have t.v. in English once again. We had a fabulous time on our trip and I will put some pictures up here in the next day or two.

Outta here!

2010-07-01T09:19:00.000-07:00

The boys and I leave tomorrow in the a.m. for Europe. So, for the next 3 weeks, it will be pretty quiet around here. I will try and post some pictures every now and then so Grandma and Grandpa C. can see what the squirts are up to.

After a week of running around like a woman with her pants on fire, I can finally say, we are ready. I have run every errand that you could possibly imagine, some twice, crossed items off a million different to do lists, cleaned the house, spent a fortune on things to keep the boys occupied during the 12 hours of flying, and I think we are set.

I am very excited to see what the kids think of being in a foreign country. The different language, different food, castles and all of that. Drew asked me a few weeks ago, "what kind of Spanish am I going to have to speak in Germany?" Totally cracked me up. He also keeps asking things like, "do they have strawberries in Switzerland?" Ethan, my adventurous one, has been wanting to leave for the past week now and is very excited to try all the different food (he is so my child).

I will be crossing my fingers that tomorrow, both flights leave on time, that the boys are happy en route and that we arrive unscathed by the adventure. Fortunately, my kids are pretty darn good travelers. Oh, and hoping the stupid back manages to not freak out on the long flight. If so, I will be armed with my arsenal of painkillers/muscle relaxers but I am really hoping to not have to be THAT person on the plane. The one slurring their speech and falling asleep mid sentence. I have already told my mom that she can pretend she doesn't know me.

Wish us luck!!!

St. Mary's Glacier and Lake

2010-06-27T06:47:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we got out of the heat and went up to the mountains. We went up to St. Mary's glacier and lake for a little hike, lunch, and just some fun hanging out. The lake is at almost 11,000 feet but there is only a short, but rocky, 1 mile hike to get up there. Most of the altitude is gained in the drive. It was gorgeous up there and the kids got a big kick out of seeing people hiking the trail with snowboards strapped to their back so they could ride down the glacier.

Drew wasn't too interested in walking on the glacier but Ethan had fun hiking up it with Kevin and the dogs and then sliding down.

It was pretty busy up there and Kevin and I got a good laugh when during lunch the boys both said they had to pee. We told them to go off in the trees somewhere to go to the bathroom. They walk off and a few seconds later I look and they are barely off the trail, pants down and peeing with their bare bottoms in plain sight. Silly kids.

Long weekend in Utah

2010-06-22T12:29:00.000-07:00

A few weekends ago, we went down to Moab and then on to Capitol Reef National park where we met up with Kevin's parents, siblings, their spouses and children. It was a lot of fun to see everyone and my boys had a blast playing with their cousins.

Here is Drew and Ethan by the Colorado River on our way to Moab. It was so incredibly gorgeous there!

When we were in Moab, we hiked up to Delicate Arch in Arches National Park. It was a fun hike and the arch itself was amazing. If you look very closely, that is Ethan and me underneath the Delicate Arch.

Once we arrived down in Torrey, we met up with all of Kevin's family. We were excited to meet our new niece, Amelia. Ethan fell in love with her and was so interested in what the baby was doing. He was also very excited to get to hold her.

While in Torrey, we visited Capitol Reef National Park and did some hiking there. The weather was unusually cool which is why we are all bundled up here despite it being mid-June. While Drew went to Goblin Valley with the cousins, Kevin and I dragged Ethan on the Chimney Rock hike. The hike was marked "strenuous" in the guide and I would have to agree. Ethan was a trooper and afterwards we hit the local burger joint for some replenishing burgers and shakes.

All in all, it was a fun weekend away and I was happy with how great the ol' back felt both on the drive there and back and with all the hiking. Definitely an improvement over last summer's gimpiness.

One Year of Vizsla Mania!

2010-05-31T20:27:00.000-07:00

May 31st was our one year anniversary of having Ms. Ella in our house. One year ago we drove to Kansas to pick her up from her foster mom's house. We arranged to adopt her from Colorado/Wyoming Vizsla Rescue (http://www.coloradovizsla.org/) after deciding we wanted a second dog and thinking that a Vizsla would meet our lifestyle. When her foster mom called me to give me some information about her, I remember asking her, "what is Ella like?" Polly, her foster mom, just kind of chuckled and said, "oooohhhh, what can I say about Ella". At the time, I wasn't sure what that meant.

After some thought we decided to go get her and bring her home (really seeing her picture sealed the deal for me. How could I not go?). So Kevin and I hopped in the car and drove to the middle of nowhere Kansas. The kind of area where there is more than one farm tractor on the road and everyone you pass waves assuming if you are on that road, you must be part of the community.

We picked her up and then spent 4 hours with her in the car driving back to Colorado. She seemed so quiet at the time and we both thought it was hilarious how she sat up in the seat like a person would.

The past year with her has been so much fun and I can't imagine life without her in our house. She makes me laugh pretty much everyday with her antics and I now know what Polly meant with that chuckle. She is the only dog I have ever met who will hike up one butt cheek and plant it on the couch and then stand there, with 3 legs on the ground and a back hip resting on the couch with the 4th foot dangling. Like she is perching there. When I took her to the vet, she had the vet cracking up as she sat, like a person, in the exam room chair.

She is also super vocal. We are always laughing at her "talking" and all the funny sounds she makes when she is having one of her Vizsla fits, as we call it, laying on her side on her dogbed, kicking her legs and making the funniest of sounds.

She loves to go outside every morning and hunt and I love nothing more than to stand at the kitchen window with my cereal watching her get into her point and then creeping every so slowly toward some squirrel or bird who has dared to infiltrate the yard. What I don't love so much are the dead birds that come back into the house in her mouth.

It cracks me up how every morning I move her dog bed that is in our family room back its spot in the corner and every night, she takes it with her teeth and drags it between both of the couches and closer to us. Every night.

I love the wrinkly skin under her chin and the way her lips bunch up sometimes. Always makes me laugh.

What can I say, I love that dog. Here is video of her showing off her twisty, I am listening to you, head and a small bunchy lip.

An update

2010-05-26T11:32:00.001-07:00

No, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. I have had a bit of blogger's block lately and have also been really busy. So, here is just a brief update of the going's on in our house recently.

On Friday, Drew participated in the school talent show. He told 4 knock knock jokes and did an awesome job. We were so proud of him.

I realized just the other day that it has officially been 1 year since I last ran. Feel a bit blue about that but I am doing all I can to recover from my injury and that is all I can do.

The neighbors installed a chicken coop in their backyard which they put right up against our fence. As you can imagine, a certain red bird-dog is going nuts about that. Obsessing over that spot on the fence, scratching at the fence, and, my personal favorite, yipping like there is no tomorrow. Going to have to have a conversation with the neighbor I think.

I am enjoying doing my Children's Hospital volunteer work every Wednesday morning although last week did a number on me. I was asked to go down to the PICU (pediatric intensive care unit) to play with one of our oncology patients who was getting a dangerous chemo that necessitated him being in the PICU for monitoring. All the rooms in the PICU are glass walled so the nurses can see the very sick patients at all times. My supervisor told me to try not to look in the rooms. The room I was going to happened to be at the end of the unit and in walking through and turning a corner, well, I saw some things no parent would ever want to see. Totally threw me and at the same time made me really thankful to have two whole and healthy children.

Kevin turned 40 last week and I can now tease him about being officially middle aged.

My parents took the kids to San Diego when they were off track last month. They both had a blast but after a week of eating out for every meal, Ethan was getting sick of the food. My mom said he kept telling her, "my mom's food is way better than this!" At Legoland one day, they got him a slushy and he took one sip and put it aside. My mom asked him if he was going to eat it and he said, serious as can be, "grandma, I have had tons of slushies in my life and THIS is one terrible slushy!" Apparently all those high faluting 7-11 slushies have made him a bit of a slushy diva.

And, there you have it. A brief recap of our activities for the past several weeks.

Honorary Golden Girl???

2010-05-04T06:42:00.001-07:00

My body hasn't been too cooperative as of late. I won't bore you all with the all the details but things have been painful the last few weeks. Over the course of all this physical gunk, I have had people tell me that I should try pool running as a way to stay in shape. I haven't pursued that much because I don't love having to drag myself somewhere to work out and I hate reeking like chlorine afterwards.

Friday, I thought I would finally go give it a try. Maybe things would hurt less. I slapped on some self tanner, grabbed my bathing suit and towel and drove down to my neighborhood recreation center. There are a few pools to choose from and when I got there there I immediately noticed there was about 30 years between me and the next youngest person there. The pool I chose had a few people in it who, with the assistance of their canes, got out soon after I arrived. After they left, it was just me and the requisite life guard staring at me from her chair. Can you say conspicuous feeling? Nothing like having someone watch you run like a ninny back and forth. I wanted to tell her to just please leave and that if I somehow moronically managed to drown myself while running in 4 feet of water than I probably deserved to die. After 25 minutes of running around in the quiet pool I couldn't take the boredom any longer and left. It was an okay workout but nothing amazing.

When I walked into the women's locker room straight in front of me, sitting on the bench was a 70ish year old woman. She was in the process of changing and had a towel over her lap but still managed to flash me a la Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. Yuck! When I got to my locker, sitting to the left were two older, somewhat plump women who were changing out of their bathing suits. They were pulling on their underwear, the kind you could literally pull up to your chin, and I had a brief moment of sadness thinking "THIS is the crowd I roll with now? Someone just shoot me please" Is this what I am destined for? Water aerobics, bathing suits with skirts, and discussions with my exercise peers about whether Sass or Rockport makes the better shoe? Yikes!

No more pool running. However, being in the water felt good and I may try some lap swimming but next time I will go to the rec center that has the cold pool where all the triathletes swim. I would much rather hang with that crowd.

A Vizsla/Lab Cocktail

2010-04-20T15:42:00.000-07:00

Last week we dogsat my parent's 3 year old Lab, Lola, while they were away in Sedona. Ella loves having Lola to stay because she provides the perfect partner to run with, wrestle with and chew on. Both of them are slightly nuts and both are either going full tilt or they are asleep, there is no middle speed.

One night after dinner, Lola, who had been laying under the table while we ate, got up and was wet. I checked and she had peed all over while she was laying on the floor. I was a bit concerned but then thought maybe it was a fluke. The next night, same thing. I called the vet and couldn't get her in until after my parents would be home. She was also walking around dribbling a bit.

In the interest of saving my floors from urine dribbles, I went to Petsmart to buy some doggie diapers. I have to admit, it took all my self control to not bust out laughing when I had to ask the Petsmart employee which aisle had the dog diapers. There was some serious laughing when I came home and put the diaper on the dog. Nothing like a 75 lb dog in a diaper.

When my parents returned, they took Lola in to the vet. My dad was explaining what had happened and how none of those things have ever happened when she is at their house. The vet asked about what my house is like. My dad said, "well, they have 2 dogs, a 12 year old Dalmatian and a 2 year old Vizsla".

At the mention of the word Vizsla, the vet stopped him right there and said, "I think I know what the problem is". Basically, my wacky Vizsla so wears out my parent's Lab that she collapses, exhausted and no longer has any muscle control and pees. Lola, living in a one dog, no kid house apparently doesn't have the stamina for the Vizsla workout. Kind of like putting a couch potato into a Special Forces taught boot camp. It is also probably why Ella eats like it is Thanksgiving but still resembles a Brazilian supermodel.

It's Craptacular!!

2010-04-18T16:20:00.000-07:00

A good friend/family member, once told me over a bowl of cake (yes, a bowl of cake) that oftentimes, in Heather's world, things are either perfectly perfect or total crap and there is no middle. (That would be you A.P.) Totally a true assessment.

This past week, life has been so far from perfectly perfect and has instead felt like total and complete crap. Having endured Backgate 2009 and finally these past few months feeling almost human again, my craptacular body decided to muck something else up royally. So, while the back feels great, my knees feel like I am 95 and I am left feeling a bit put upon. A year ago at this time, I was running a ton, moving furniture with wild abandon, and was open and ready for anything life threw at me. Now I feel like I am only slightly removed from eating dinner at 4:00, complaining about the rain affecting my joints, and routinely wearing sensible shoes and polyester. So not perfect.

After wallowing in self pity and massive quantities of dark chocolate this past week, I was reminded of the wisdom shared over a bowl of cake. This week, no matter what my ancient feeling body throws at me, I am going to focus on that middle ground and the things that are still really amazing and wonderful about my life.

Our resident wisecracking guy

2010-04-08T07:55:00.000-07:00

Lately, Ethan has been dropping these hilarious and a bit snarky one liners. It is particularly funny coming from him because he is a bit reserved and always so nice to everyone. He has always had a bit of a goofy streak but this is a whole new thing and is cracking me up.

Over the weekend, we were all in the car and we drove past a church where they were loading some miniature ponies into a truck. They had a sign saying "Free Pony Rides". Kevin, joking around, said, "oh, darn! I missed my chance to have a free pony ride!". We hear a snicker from the back and then Ethan says, under his breath, "that pony would SO be going down if you got on him."

Silly kid!

Maybe We Should Move Him Up to Boulder...

2010-04-01T09:06:00.000-07:00

Our trash service started offering recycling a few years back. I finally got around to calling and signing us up for it a week ago (yes, it only took me 2 years - it is all about priorities people). They delivered the bins and we have been tossing all our paper, plastic and metal into them.

Drew, was super excited about the fact that we were going to recycle. They talk a lot about it at school and recycle at school. He insists on personally delivering anything that needs to go to the recycle bin. The other morning, I got chewed out by him for forgetting about the recycling and daring to throw a jam jar into the trash compactor. What WAS I thinking!?

I have some glass milk bottles sitting on the counter that need to go back to Whole Foods, who give me a refund for my bottle credit. He keeps eyeing those and then asking me, "are you going to recycle those?" I keep explaining that they go to the store, not in the bins but I still end up getting a lecture about how they should go in the bin. As a result of all this zealous, recycling behavior, we have dubbed him the "recycle Nazi". Even Ethan, has mumbled to him a few times, "you are really nuts about the recycling".

The one bright spot with his new obsession is it is getting him to throw things away. I can't tell you how many pieces of cardboard were in his room that he was "saving" for a project. The recycle bins arrived and he cleared his room of anything recyclable. Now if I can just get him to be so energetic about organizing all the other crap in there. If only Lego's and Star Wars figures were recyclable.

All Star Wars all the Time

2010-03-08T15:32:00.000-08:00

Drew has been obsessed with Star Wars the past few years. He eats, sleeps and breathes Star Wars. Almost literally. The kid sleeps on Star Wars sheets, more often than not in a Star Wars t-shirt.

Over the past few years, I have gotten an education in all things Star Wars. One that I never wanted but have obtained, none the less. This Halloween, Ethan and Drew dressed as Boba Fett and Jango Fett, respectively. Halloween night, Kevin was asking who Jango Fett was and I told him, "Jango Fett was Boba Fett's father who was killed at the beginning of the Clone Wars. But actually Boba isn't really Jango's son but rather a clone of the bounty hunter". Silence followed and I am sure Kevin was thinking, "who is this nerd and where is the woman I married?"

Lately, Drew has taken to quoting the movie. For a while, me getting mad at him in any way would result in him sticking his arm out, making a face and some weird noises and then telling me he was "'lectricing me" like the Emperor. Then we went through the "you don't know the power of the dark side" phase. If anyone teases him, he enjoys saying, "laugh it up Fuzzball!!" More recently when I tell him to go clean up his room, he is likely to mutter under his breath as he walks off, "Jedi scum".

All in all, it kind of cracks me up although I do have worries about him attending conventions as an adult dressed in costume.

April Harmer: April 1970-February 1988

2010-02-26T07:05:00.000-08:00

Dear April,

I can't believe that it has been 22 years this weekend since you were here. Seems like yesterday in some ways and then in some ways it seems forever ago. My memories of you have become a bit muddled over the years. I cannot for the life of me remember how your voice sounded but I can remember, and always picture, the way you would tilt your head just slightly when you would sing. I can remember sneaking into the hospital to see you and driving you in your wheelchair all over the unit. I think we knocked over your chemo pump about a million times and that darn thing would start beeping at us. I can remember laughing hysterically the time we got Grandma Harmer to put on one of your wigs. Good times.

I still miss you and wish you were here. I wonder often what kind of woman you would have become. Would you have married? Would you love chocolate and trashy reality t.v. as much as me? Would you still write poetry? I am taking notes on all things life and living like you asked me too (oh, and taking notes on that other thing we talked about, wink, wink).

I was thinking about my memories of you the other night and I was remembering a cold winter night, a few weeks before you died. Mom and dad were out somewhere, can't remember where. I was getting ready to go out with some friends and you and I were sitting in the family room. You asked me if I really had to go because you said you were scared to be home alone. At the time, I think I thought it was some irrational fear of nighttime or something but now I suspect you were afraid of being alone for much bigger reasons. You knew why you had been brought home from the hospital. Of course, being 14, I left you there. I wish I had been less of a self absorbed teenager and instead more able to see something bigger going on outside of myself.

Love you always.

Heather

Heather's Theory of Expectation

2010-02-24T13:56:00.001-08:00

**Disclaimer: Not as good or complex as Einstein's Theory of Relativity**

Very recently, I did something I had put off for many years. (Not really going to go into what so try to follow the talking in code here.) When the idea was first presented to me, 6 years ago, I decided that I was pretty sure what the outcome would be and it was something I just didn't want to deal with at the time so nothing was done. Just last week, this thing was finally done only to discover that what I had been so afraid of for 6 years wasn't actually there. Don't you love how life works like that?

All of this has gotten me thinking about expecation and how we can sometimes mess ourselves up letting our expectations of things get ahead of reality. Being that I am a huge planner, type A (okay, fine, anal) type person, I am guilty of this quite often. When the kids were younger and we would go grocery shopping if someone had a tantrum midway through the store, that kind of thing would completely throw me for a loop. I expected to get through my grocery shopping rather than hauling a screaming toddler out of the store.

When we first found out Drew had special needs and that life for him was going to be a lot of therapies and a lot of unknowns, it was really hard for me to sort of say goodbye to what I expected his future to be. All those things, college, marriage, independent living now became big question marks. I would be lying if I said it wasn't hard for me to let go of some of that. However, 10 years into this, I can honestly say that there is some freedom in letting go of what we expect to be or to happen and to just live in the moment.

There is this quote I read once by Mark Twain that said something like most of the worries he had in his life never actually happened. I guess it is just human nature to get ahead of ourselves sometimes. Last week's event has reminded me to be a bit more open minded.

Her two favorite words

2010-02-19T09:25:00.000-08:00

Ella loves to lay in the sunny spot on our stairs in the morning. Yesterday, she was laying there in a deep sleep and I took this right after I whispered her two favorite words, dog park. Having had only a deaf dog for the past 11 years, I enjoy watching her head snap to attention right after I say the words. I don't have to ask twice, that is for sure. I have a pretty similar reaction to the words dark chocolate.

So THAT's what the world looks like

2010-02-18T17:06:00.000-08:00

Ethan just got glasses about a week ago. He is excited about them and was very cute walking out of the optical shop saying, "wow, I can see the snow on the mountains" and "that building looks so clear". He debuted the new glasses Tuesday at school which was his first day back after their 3 week track off. He said he quickly got sick of everyone saying, "you got glasses!"

On a side note, the other night he was talking to me about the Olympics and I told him that Kevin and I had been to several events at the SLC Olympics. As I was listing off the events we had gone to, Drew came into the room. He got wide eyes and said, "you and dad were in the Olympics and did all those things!!!" I had to clarify that we were sitting like lumps in the stand rather than testing our athletic meddle but I love him for even thinking it was a possibility.

Bob and Jillian have nothing on these guys.

2010-01-28T14:08:00.000-08:00

Every morning, I go down to our basement workout room and spend some time on the treadmill and then do weights, or legs, or abs. Every morning, Polka and Ella follow me down, watch me walk and then the minute I am on the floor, both of them are there "helping". Because when I am hot and sweaty and trying to do crunches or to stretch, what I really want is a hairy, hot dog body pressed up against me or even worse, a furry friend trying to kiss me every time I crunch up.

This shot is from this morning. We are dog sitting Lola, my parent's lab while they are out of town. Here you can see my personal trainers keeping me on track. Well, two of the them anyway, the black one was busy trying to eat my earbud. I think it is time to have the personal space discussion with them again.

Scouts Honor

2010-01-27T07:27:00.000-08:00

Ethan's best buddy, Noah, recently joined Cub Scouts and asked if Ethan would like to join. Drew told him he shouldn't join because then he would have "to sell those cookies". After I clarified the difference between Boy and Girl Scouts, Ethan decided to go to one meeting to try it out. After the first meeting, I asked what they did and he said, "we learned about the flag and then practiced folding it the right way". Inside, I was thinking, booooooorrrrring but when asked if he liked it Ethan said, "it was AWESOME!". So he was hooked and we now have a Scout in the house.

Last night was his 3rd time going and he finally had his uniform. He was so proud of his shirt and told me to take his picture and to make sure to put it on Facebook so I can show my friends. He was awarded his first pin last night for learning about weather and he was super excited about that. He was asking me how long you can be in Scouts and I told him a person can get an Eagle Scout award which is the highest award in scouting. He said very determindly, "I am going to get that award".

Visiting the neighbors

2010-01-20T13:53:00.000-08:00

The kids had Monday off for MLK Day. I took them to the doughnut shop and we went up to an overlook near our house to eat. It was one of those gorgeous Colorado days and we enjoyed our sugar and our panoramic view of the mountains. On the way home, we stopped to check out our bison neighbors who were happily munching their hay. Ethan was cracking me up telling them through the fence what tasty burgers they make. He is such a little comedian and he is right, they do make an excellent burger.

Some lessons learned in 2009

2010-01-01T08:24:00.000-08:00

Last night as I was laying in bed at midnight (yes, I am boring but I am also well rested) listening to the fireworks and hoopla outside, I was thinking about this past year and some of the lessons learned this year.

* Here is the big one for me personally this year: we can't choose what happens to us in life, the only thing we can choose is whether we decide to suffer or rise above. Easier said than done in a lot of instances.

* Family is always important. Whether you are meeting all your first cousins for a laughter filled lunch or you are rushing to Utah to be with your dad for his bypass surgery, family are the people who remind you of where you came from and who always have your back. Always make time for them.

* When your oldest son tells you after school one day, "my penis was tingling today at school", it is imperative not to burst out laughing.

* Stubbornness, while it has some benefits, can sometimes not serve a person well. For example, when you have a herniated disc in your back, you don't stubbornly ignore it and run a half marathon anyway. You will be kicking yourself during the 2 outlandishly painful months that will follow.

* Having a friend who will call you everyday to ask how your back is feeling, listen to you complain about it and then tell you it is going to get better and she knows that because she has been through the exact thing, is a rare gift.

* It is nice to feel understood. Having a fun, supportive group of mom's to walk on this special needs journey with is priceless.

* Life is too short to wait to do the things we want to do. Which is how I ended up with this year's Christmas present and blistering fingers but a big smile on my face and a sense of excitement at learning something new.

I am sure I could go on and on because isn't life constantly full of lessons. I hope 2010 is a good year. I think almost everyone would prefer something better in the coming year than 2009 brought us all. I am optimistic that it is going to be something better if for no other reason than we all learned some things in this past, harder year.

Happy New Year!!!

Ms. Ella-Bella's 2nd Birthday

2009-12-30T13:07:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Ella's 2nd birthday. We went on a special trip to the big dog park that has a walking trail, agility things and lots of bushes with good smells. Afterwards, we took her down to the Wag N' Wash, our local doggie spa/bakery, and got her a frosted bone for her birthday. She was excited to be allowed to surf the counter and snack on her treat. The kids insisted on singing to her and at the end of it all, I got a big, sloppy kiss. We are so glad we have her in our family.

The trappings of my former life

2009-12-23T15:32:00.000-08:00

We cleaned out our closets a few weeks ago and in the process uncovered all my running shoes from the past few years. Over my years of running, many shoes have been bought and discarded and these 7 were lingering around still for some reason. The white pair on the left, I ran my first marathon in. The sassy gold pair on the right, my second. There are stories and miles and conversations with my running buddy, Kelly, associated with each pair of those shoes.

I went to the Sports Authority the other day to get a new pair of running -wait, scratch that - workout shoes. Standing in the aisle, considering all the choices, I had a brief pang of sadness realizing that I no longer had to buy the amped up running shoes I have been buying the past 5 years. Darn herniated disc!! If you would have told me, 5 years ago before I took up running, that I would be sad about no longer being able to run, I would have told you to get your marbles checked. However, after 5 years of doing it and loving it, it has become so ingrained in me and so much a part of me that since stopping 6 months ago, I frequently dream that I am running. I always have to laugh a bit at my subconscious because in every dream, I am running along and there is always some point where I think to myself, "my back doesn't even hurt!"

Living here in Colorado doesn't help either. At any moment, on any day, I can see someone running in my community. I drive past and honestly can almost feel my legs aching, wanting to stretch out and go.

Standing in the shoe aisle, I felt that pang of sadness but also a little glimmer of possibility. There were trail shoes, crosstrainers, hikers and endless opportunities to discover another way to get out and go. After 36 years on this planet I have decided life is all about adapting and I am working on adapting.

Not looking for a consolation prize

2009-12-18T12:06:00.000-08:00

Ethan's 2nd grade class had their Christmas party yesterday morning. Like all good stay at home moms, I came to the party to watch the kids do their thing. In Ethan's class is a girl who has special needs and who is part of Drew's significant special needs class. During the party, the kids all sat on the floor in a circle and played a game that involved opening a wrapped book but doing it following the direction of a poem. When this girl's turn came, she listened carefully to the directions and then with the help of her aide, shakily walked to the middle of the circle, chose a book and unwrapped it. While she was doing this, I was just looking around the room and I noticed all these women standing there clutching their hands and with an "isn't that so special" kind of look on their faces.

In an instant, I went from enjoying the party to feeling irritated. I usually don't get irritated or offended easily and I am generally pretty easy going. Someone could walk up to me and tell me they think I am dumb or ugly or whatever and honestly, it wouldn't phase me. However, when it comes to this stuff, I can't be so zen and I get irritated. While I appreciate that people mean well, I find it somewhat condescending and patronizing to have people fawning over anything a kiddo with special needs does.

It is the same irritation I have when people tell me, "you are blessed to have a child with special needs" or "those kids are such a joy!" You might as well give me a paper cut and pour lemon juice in it while you are at it because I am irritated, irritated, irritated!!!! Both of those comments almost feel to me like someone trying to offer me some sort of consolation prize for not having given birth to a typical child. As if they need to somehow assure me that it is okay that I didn't get that precocious, Gerber baby that all mothers secretly desire. How do I explain to a well intentioned person that what they see as a blessing and God at work to me sometimes feels really hard and like God is on strike? I certainly don't remember jumping up and down in the motherhood line yelling, "oooh, oooh, pick me, pick me."

Plus, my child may have special needs and he is a joy but he is also a little boy who sometimes gets mad or has tantrums. To make it all sound so rosy to me somehow undermines how difficult this journey really is. How hard it is to hear predictions about your child's future, diagnosis, i.q. test results and then to have to figure which of those "experts" yammering in your ear you want to embrace and which to ignore. To consider your child living at home forever and to try and figure out what is going to happen to them when you die. All those things, not so rosy.

I have probably now scared you all away from ever saying anything to me again about my son. Go ahead and talk to me about him but please, when you are coming at me with a cliche or platitude, maybe think again and think about something specific to him to tell me instead. I love my child dearly and think he is the most fabulous thing in the world and I really, truly don't need a consolation prize.

Ella's new favorite thing

2009-11-30T13:08:00.000-08:00

Ella has discovered a new, favorite way to harass Polka Dot. They love to wrestle, well, okay, Ella loves to wrestle and Polka just goes along with it. There seems to be a match of some sort going on constantly around here and my personal favorite is when I am working from home and they get going in the office. Cuz I really enjoy all the background noise or talking on the phone to someone from work with moany, snarly noises in the background.

Anyway, they love to growl, bounce and nibble each other ad nauseum. Recently, Ella discovered that if she grabs onto Polka's collar, she can yank poor Polka all over the place. So, this is her new thing and Polka's collar is going to be quickly chewed through if it continues.

The hard parts of life

2009-11-19T07:52:00.000-08:00

Reading something a family member recently wrote on her blog has me thinking a lot the past few days about why bad, or hard, things happen to us? I think it is probably one of the greatest, unanswered questions of life. How do we reconcile our ability to guide our lives, through our choices and goals that we set, with the uncontrollable aspect that is this human condition?

I have been sort of dwelling on this subject the past few days from the perspective of my own life. I have had my share of moments in life where I was asking, why me or why did this have to happen. I remember distinctly the day my sister died, leaving our downstairs office, where she had been sleeping and where she died, going into the kitchen and basically falling to the floor, thinking how did this happen? That feeling of being caught unaware is something I can remember like it was yesterday and honestly, a moment I try not to relive too often.

I had been raised in a very religious family and during the course of my sister's illness many, many people had been praying for her or fasting for her and I had been taught that there was someone out there who listened to these prayers. After her death, I felt like I had just been sold oceanfront property in Arizona. I had been sold on something that I, in my immature 14 year old state, thought was going to make good things happen for me and for my family. And then she died. In my mind, we had done everything right and by the rules and still had this tragic outcome. Why?

In adulthood, when my oldest was born with developmental disabilities and mild cerebral palsy, I was again brought back to the why, why me. I had done everything by the book during my pregnancy. I avoided shellfish, I didn't highlight my hair, I even gave up (gasp!) Diet Coke and yet I had a baby who they think suffered a stroke in utero and had damage to his brain. I felt like I had already done abnormal childhood with the 4 years of cancer and then death, thank you very much, and now my mothering experience was also going to be atypical? Seriously? Pick on someone else.

Literally for a good year, I hated everyone who managed to have a healthy, typically developing baby. I would go to these coffee klatch/play date things where the moms chat and the toddlers play and I would seethe inside. While they were raving about how Susie walked early, how Johnny could speak in sentences or how McKayla potty trained herself, I would sit there with a smile on my face but inside feel rage. What did they do that I didn't? Didn't I deserve that as much as them? Didn't my son deserve to live unfettered by therapies and differences and limitations? This was not the way I wanted things to go.

I wish I could say that those experiences brought me some magic answer as to why really, really hard things happen in life but I don't really have that answer. For myself, time and maturity have made me realize that there is a lot in life we can't control. All we have control over is what we decide to do about it or our reaction to it. In the instance of my sister's death, I eventually came to terms with the fact that it was just one of those freakish things. Her cells mutated and made tumors basically for no reason. It was a big, big lesson early on in my life that the universe is beyond our control and that fact makes life a little bit scary and really hard at times.

Now, I can't say that realizing that made it any easier to adapt to my son's situation or other hard things that have come up in life. I still have to spend time being angry and adjusting to a new reality. I think no matter how zen you are about these things, you still have to go through all those emotions but then eventually you have to surrender to the reality you have or else you will be stuck. In the situation with my son, I let myself be stuck and angry probably longer than I should have but these things in life aren't always so easy to mind over matter yourself out of.

Not sure if I have a point here but just wanted to share what has been swirling in my brain the past few days.

Our wacky Ms. Ella

2009-11-18T10:01:00.001-08:00

It has been 6 months since we adopted Ella from Vizsla rescue and we are so happy we added her to our home. When they first called us from the rescue group, I wasn't so sure we were going to take her. They told me they thought she had a kidney issue and would need prescription dog food that is $90 a bag and also she was fostered in Kansas and we would have to spend 8 hours in the car to go get her. What won me over was the way her foster mom described her and she really sounded like a perfect fit.

So off to Kansas we went to get our girl. Fortunately, after getting her home and having some extensive testing done by our vet, it was determined she did not have a kidney issue and really she is healthy as can be.

We have loved getting to know her personality these past few months. Whenever we are sitting on the couch, she comes up, hikes up one hip and plants one butt cheek on the couch. Almost like she it trying to sit like a person. It always makes me laugh.

She also loves to cuddle on the couch or in bed and if she could have her way, she would be sleeping with us nightly, under the covers.

She and the neighborhood squirrel have recently discovered each other and it cracks me up watching the face off between the two of them everyday. I swear that squirrel taunts her purposefully. This morning she was in full point mode and very, very slowly moving toward the squirrel. Of course, with him high up on the fence or high in the tree, she will never catch him but I think she loves the challenge.

Some pictures from our weekend in Bachelor Gulch

2009-11-02T14:43:00.000-08:00

The boys have been off track from school the past few weeks so a few weekends ago we headed up to the mountains to spend the weekend. We went back to Bachelor Gulch to a condo we had rented before.

Ethan, executing a "big jump" into the pool. Before anyone calls social services, yes, we do feed him but he is still one skinny little monster.

Drew who has finally turned into a decent swimmer.

This year, on the way up to our destination, we made a side trip to Leadville, a very cute historic mining town. Leadville is the highest incorporated city in the US and sits at 10,150 feet. The city is surrounded by what we here in CO refer to as 14'ners and it is gorgeous. The town is steeped in old west history. Doc Holliday had his last shootout here, Susan B. Anthony spoke at the opera house, Houdini performed there and many fortunes were made mining gold and silver. All around, a fun place to visit.

Halloween Pictures

2009-11-02T14:38:00.001-08:00

Drew and Ethan were Jango Fett and Boba Fett this year for Halloween. They had a lot of fun carving their pumpkins all by themselves this year and had fun trick or treating. We are now sufficiently up to our eyeballs in candy and if it goes like previous years, they will eat some of it for a few days and then get bored with it. Then it sits for a few months until I am like, hey, if no one is going to eat this crap I am tossing it. It's funny because they like candy to a point but then after a few days they just aren't interested.

Getting her stink on

2009-10-21T07:18:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I was reading a magazine that was full of perfume samples. Ella came over, took a sniff and then was pressing her nose on the perfume sample. I opened it and she started moaning and rubbing herself all over on it. I know dogs love to rub themselves on animal smells out in the wild and other gross things, but perfume?

Now, every time I read a magazine there she is mangling it trying to smell all the smells. The interesting thing to me is that not all perfume samples elicit this response. She is choosy about what she wants to rub herself on. It amuses me to know that there are people out there unwittingly wearing a scent that aside from attracting the opposite sex is also going to have my dog trying to rub herself on them. **Note to self, do not wear perfume to the dog park.

Here in the video, it is Polo for Men. Afterward, she was strutting about reeking like a frat house on a Saturday night.